Chronic Illness as a Mirror

Then there was the acquaintance who began to tell me the story of how he has a friend who is a paraplegic.   He went ton to say, "When I am feeling bad about my life, I think about her and I feel better about what I am going through."  He then added, "Perhaps you can now do this for others."  I immediately recoiled from his words.  His mirror illuminated his personal definition of gratitude.  I interpreted what he was saying as that we only feel better about our own plight by comparing our lives to those "less fortunate."  In no way, shape or form, do I want to ever be someone's reason for feeling glad that they aren't me.  This is a philosophy which I have never understood.  We are all on our own separate journeys and there are no comparisons.  We all have our individual blessings and challenges in life.  When we make such comparisons we are, in essence, judging someone's life as having less merit or worth because of circumstance.  There are miserable people who seem to have everything in life including their health and there are some very happy people who find joy despite their very difficult challenges.  Everything in life is relative. 

When we speak about having Multiple Sclerosis to others, it can be a real learning experience.  You get to learn about how others view not only illness but about the other person's core beliefs about such things as religion, philosophy, and life in general.  It is not only a mirror of other's beliefs but also a mirror into our own.  What we value and what we believe will be illuminated during such discussions.  As a result will we feel more validated in our core truths or will we begin again, the never ending process of self examination and reflection?

What about you?  Have you discovered this mirror of values and beliefs when you have talked about your disease with others?  What revelations or conclusions have you come to as a result?  Tell us your story.