I thought I'd share this little journey of mine since some of you might relate to parts of it. I consider one of my biggest losses since my diagnosis seven years ago is not being able to play tennis anymore. My legs have become too stiff, clumsy and a bit weak to chase balls - and a lack of stamina (that darn fatigue) doesn't let me play for long.

Added into that, I have nerve pain on my left side that makes planning any physical activity iffy.

So, yeah, whatever. I recently decided to try playing again. At a competitive level.

Here's how it happened. I was watching Wimbledon and once again feeling wistful and I saw something about wheelchair tennis. My reaction was feeling jealous. "Those paraplegics can play and I can't!" Of course, as soon as that silly thought flitted through my brain, I realized how stupid it was. I am so lucky to still have use of my legs.

The fact is that if people can play wheelchair tennis, then I can find a way to play too. After all, I'm always reading about people with MS climbing mountains! This will be my mountain. If you have never seen competitive wheelchair tennis, you'd be amazed. It's played at a very high level using sports chairs that enable the player to maneuver quickly and reach out without risk of tipping over.

I wasn't sure how I was going to play again so over the weekend, I went out to a wheelchair tennis clinic to see if that would work for me.

It was a little weird walking onto the court where several people in wheelchairs, and obviously needing the chairs, were playing. I didn't look disabled. I wasn't even limping or using a cane. I asked to play. The group leader was expecting me and knew my issues. Still, I could see by his expression that he was expecting someone who looked a little more disabled. It turns out that because I was a little late, he had given away the sports chair he was saving for me to someone else. That person was wheelchair bound so how could I complain!

The group leader suggested that I play on the next court over with another standing person. I really wanted to play so I went over to the next court and gave it a try. I was unable to take more than one stiff step toward any ball that came into my court so it was a bit of a fiasco. It just wasn't going to work.

It was clear to me though that I just had to play again. I loved being on the court and holding my racquet. I loved being outdoors. So I tried and tried. And then a couple more wheelchair players showed up and I was asked to give up the court for them. Of course I did. After all, this was a clinic for wheelchair players and I was odd-woman out.

I'll try again this next weekend when the group meets again, but unless I buy a sports chair myself, the chairs this group supplies will always go first to those who really need them. So I will have to show up just hoping that one will be left over for my use. Until I know that this is a viable option for me, I certainly am not going to invest in a sports wheelchair yet. I'm sure they're pretty pricey.