Who will help?

Thanks Jake for another great post. I hope your mother gets out of the hospital quickly and your family isn't in limbo much longer about what's wrong.

The point you raise about being prepared to be a caregiver or knowing who your own caregiver would be struck a nerve with me. I have always been the caregiver in my family -- for my husband and kids whenever an illness (or tough day at work/school) arose. My parents recently moved closer to me, marking me as the child they would rely on to help out in their old age. I've always been the responsible one that people can rely on.

But now I have MS and the role reversal is not easy -- not for my family and not for me. The assumptions I had about who would be there if I ever needed help were all wrong. Illness frightens some people and also can cause resentment. I didn't realize this until I needed help. The person who is my "caregiver" is mainly my teenage daughter. It's not a role I want her to be in but she stepped up to be in that role.

The adults around me still want me to take care of them -- they don't like this role reversal. I do wonder who will be there for me in a crisis. Mandy is very fortunate to have you there.

My best wishes for you and your family.

- Julie