Face it, after you’ve been a caregiver for a while, you find it almost second nature to keep one eye on the person in your charge. But when that person has relapsing-remitting MS, as does my wife, there are times when the remitting part overtakes the relapsing part. That’s right -- there ...
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Response to Jake
Denise Coleman
Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 10:21 AM
Hi, I am not a caregiver, I live with MS, but I did read and enjoy your posting. First I want to say that it sounds as if you and Mandy have a good relationship, built on a strong foundation so you have both been able to make the adjustments the MonSter demands as they have come up, yet you are sensitive enough to understand how important her independence is to her when she is feeling better. To me that says that in your marriage you have both understood the importance of open and honest communications; too often we want others to know how we feel and what we need or want without telling them and without them having any reason to understand what we are experiencing.
I applaud the relationship you two have built together, I know it isn't always easy, and your love for your wife that is so obvious in the choices you have made, your willingness to listen and to continue learning and your happiness for her when she does have a period of time when she feels better.
I have lived alone since 1995 and have hired people to come help me at times when I need assistance, which is very different than having someone who loves you and whom you love help you during these times that are so difficult in so many ways. I was pleased to read your posting and hear about how you and Mandy have such a good partnership in this area. You are a caregiver, yes, but it sounds like you are more a carepartner, which might reflect your emotional caring as well. Thanks for sharing this. Denise
re: Response to Jake
Jake Crest
Tuesday, June 17, 2008 at 10:49 AM
Denise,
It's comments like yours that make writing worthwhile.
Carepartner, huh? I kind of like that. Thanks -- and take care of yourself. Oh, and feel free to chime in anytime. We need more people commenting around here. How else are we going to get to know one another?
Best,
Jake
Hi, I am not a caregiver, I live with MS, but I did read and enjoy your posting. First I want to say that it sounds as if you and Mandy have a good relationship, built on a strong foundation so you have both been able to make the adjustments the MonSter demands as they have come up, yet you are sensitive enough to understand how important her independence is to her when she is feeling better. To me that says that in your marriage you have both understood the importance of open and honest communications; too often we want others to know how we feel and what we need or want without telling them and without them having any reason to understand what we are experiencing.
I applaud the relationship you two have built together, I know it isn't always easy, and your love for your wife that is so obvious in the choices you have made, your willingness to listen and to continue learning and your happiness for her when she does have a period of time when she feels better.
I have lived alone since 1995 and have hired people to come help me at times when I need assistance, which is very different than having someone who loves you and whom you love help you during these times that are so difficult in so many ways. I was pleased to read your posting and hear about how you and Mandy have such a good partnership in this area. You are a caregiver, yes, but it sounds like you are more a carepartner, which might reflect your emotional caring as well. Thanks for sharing this. Denise