Hi Helen,  Oh, can I identify with you! There is no easy answer to your question because we are all different. When it was time to make that decision for me, it was because the frustration level had hit an all time high when I lost my sense of direction driving home alone from the supermarket and I was only 6 blocks from home. 

In order to keep my sanity, and not lose my independence, my hubby and 2 sons and I agreed that it was best for me to do certain activities with someone else. So far, that is only going out in the car and all doctor appointments (which is a good idea anyway to take someone along with you). 

Around the house, simple chores can take me hours to get done and complicated chores can be accomplished in a few minutes. You see what I mean when I say we are all different?  What comes easy to you may be difficult for me and vice versa.  

To actually have an aide come into our home to help me with ADL's and household things, I have not come to that point yet and as long as I have people still living in my house, I doubt I ever will.  However, I do spend very long hours alone because of their work schedules. During any 24 hour period, I can be alone for as long as 12 hours, however at least 6 of those hours are sleeping hours.

To keep from boredom, frustration at not being able to do something, and from make haphazard decisions in the moment, I am on the computer a lot - so there is always someone to talk to. One other thing I do, which may be of help to you, is two days a week, I "schedule" innings or outings.   Innings are when I invite a friend over for say lunch or just a visit for a couple of hours. Outings are when I schedule a friend or two and we just go shopping, add in lunch, walking in the mall, sometimes just sitting at the Food Court and chatting.  The point is to have a change of scenery and it really does help your mind to stay sharp, keeps your motor skills practicing and well oiled. 

If you live alone, import friends instead of having to pay for an aide. Contact your local senior center and get on their list for afternoon visits once or twice a week. If you are part of a housing development, see if they have community activities that involve pitching in to cook/serve meals. Our community here has pot luck dinners twice a week and people donate whatever amount of money than can (usually $2 - $3) to help with costs. Getting involved with planning is a great way to keep yourself active in and out of the home.  Often there are nice fringe benefits where you can take a covered dish home for another night's meal.

As far as struggling with the smart phone,,,,,,it is a smart phone!  I don't even try, so you are one up on me there. 

Don't doubt your abilities to take care of yourself physically/cognitively unless you have had a serious incident that requires you to import help into your home. I hope you can gain a little confidence from this note. 

Take care,

Anne