Information and opinions on health from Marishka at HealthCentral.com. HealthCentral.com is one of the top health destinations on the Web, with more than 35 condition-specific, wellness and general health Web properties. http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/557694/index http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/557694/rss self application/xml en-us 15 120 19 http://www.healthcentral.com/images/hc_logo_sm.gif http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/557694/index http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/139384/hearts-good Fri, 03 Jun 2011 16:14:55 -0400 Marishka I don't think these hearts are a good idea.  I am too tired to explain.  Sounds like many feel this way. Creates added complexity and stress.     http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/139384/hearts-good http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/111540/lot-chocolate Thu, 13 May 2010 06:45:38 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   I just ate so much chocolate...I have so much fear and rage...so much terror and anxiety...   I have ordered some ativan finally and will pick it up tomorrow...I have decided it is better to take it for now and deal with taking a benzodiazapine later, maybe I can take one a day and leave it at that...I need it right now...   So very much fear and terror....I need to get this out...as much as I would like to forget... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/111540/lot-chocolate http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/111483/unappreciated Wed, 12 May 2010 12:18:48 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   I have not been on in a while...not posting, not responding....I simply have had too much body pain to sit in front of my computer with the car noise...have been in the park as much as possible...which is nice for that but not feeling much connection or validation or comraderie...   the ducks and the wild geese...we get along very well...   but I notice that since I have been so sick, my ability to contribute and... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/111483/unappreciated http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/109463/less-is-more Sat, 17 Apr 2010 10:20:36 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   I have a small paper in the corner of my mirror that says that...less is more..and  it is for me...I am overwhelmed by all the things to do and how fast and complicated life is...cars, freeways, appointments, gadgets...I long for a simple life. I would have the life of a hundred years ago if I could...   Don't have this simple life right now but that is my goal.  I wonder if I can create somewhat of  one in... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/109463/less-is-more http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/109398/decisions Fri, 16 Apr 2010 13:20:05 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   what are the ways to make the best decisions? do we always have good choices or sometimes what seems like the best of what we have available?  does it matter a lot what we choose?  are there bad decisions?  how do we make them when we are depressed and things are needing to change to help the depression and you are not supposed to make decisions when you are depressed?   OK So I've had some big... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/109398/decisions http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108932/rage-rage Sat, 10 Apr 2010 19:10:12 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   I am so angry.  I run the risk of monopolizing the conversation with so many posts all close together...since I have not been able to post or talk for such a long time, I have such rage built up inside I feel I will explode.   Does anyone know what it is like to be humiliated everyday of one's life, subjugated, humiliated, talked down to, treated as less than, and have no recourse but to continue to swim until you... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108932/rage-rage http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108918/feeling Sat, 10 Apr 2010 15:01:18 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   I have been missing this community so much..not being able to access the site...   I have been a bundle of nerves lately...just so panicked...feeling a lack of support, not having the kind words of people on here..just feeling too isolated..   My therapist has felt less than supportive and I have been feeling very alone, scared and vunlnerable... so drained...     I have just been able to get back on... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108918/feeling http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108911/site-working Sat, 10 Apr 2010 13:21:36 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   it is good to see everyone!   I am finally able to post again and respond.  This site is so important to me in my support and recently it has not allowed me to post or respond over and over again.  I feel so much frustration at this site. I feel so much worse not having this site as support.   I do not have much energy right now after trying and trying to get the site to work so I did not respond to... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108911/site-working http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108642/talk Wed, 07 Apr 2010 11:39:06 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   It is strange how when we have depression (or maybe this thinking also causes depression..actually I am certain it does...)   when someone or someones treat us badly, we internalize it and think we are bad instead of they are 'bad' or treating us badly and we don't deserve it...   I know people with 'high self esteem' think this latter way...   well I have been knowing recently that I don't deserve to be... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108642/talk http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108639/support-group Wed, 07 Apr 2010 11:07:06 -0400 Marishka Hi all,   Well, I am looking into a support group led by a therapist in my town.  The insurance companies sure make you feel very small begging for help from them after we pay them so much money to get care....then they act like they are doing us a favor by helping us and put us through hell to get the help, then make it impossible to get the help...   I have been fuming with anger at all the demeaning treatment I've felt by... http://www.healthcentral.com/depression/c/557694/108639/support-group