Information and opinions on health from The Long Hauler at HealthCentral.com. HealthCentral.com is one of the top health destinations on the Web, with more than 35 condition-specific, wellness and general health Web properties. http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/623055/index http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/623055/rss self application/xml en-us 15 120 19 http://www.healthcentral.com/images/hc_logo_sm.gif http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/623055/index http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/137227/relate-quick Sun, 24 Apr 2011 23:54:05 -0400 The Long Hauler This morning I was feeling confident, better than I had felt in a while, journaling about treating my intrusive, repetitive, destructive thoughts as just that, thoughts, and nothing more. I firmly set myself in that direction and was having a good day. Then, later on this afternoon and into the evening, those "thoughts" came in a tumult, repeating, constantly jumping in where they didn't belong and before I knew it, I found myself consumed in... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/137227/relate-quick http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/118917/obsessed Tue, 31 Aug 2010 14:44:42 -0400 The Long Hauler I'm not sure how many of you can relate, but I seem to have obsessive elements with my episodes of mania, bipolar depression, and the like. None of the recurring thoughts sit right with me as far as who I really am, but they feel like a shoulder tapping, my own little childish thought that inserts itself everytime my mind hovers around a subject closely or loosely related to it. For instance, I'm thinking on moral matters after watching a crime... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/118917/obsessed http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/113291/manage Fri, 04 Jun 2010 16:17:23 -0400 The Long Hauler I am just on the last legs (thankfully) of a severe episode that lasted a little over seven days. I was manic, depression had me pinned, and obsessive thoughts were on record-skip and there was basically nothing I could do. I met my pdoc on the middle of it and she prescribed a new med that's just now starting to kick in after about four days. I spent most of my time trying to keep my mind focused on the moment of being occupied with activities... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/113291/manage http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/111360/ideas-sleep Tue, 11 May 2010 00:58:16 -0400 The Long Hauler So, here I sit; it's about 1AM, and I'm unable to sleep again. As a byproduct of my Bipolar no doubt, my mind will not let my body rest. I've tried everything to bring my mind and body to a normal cycle in which the rest of the world operates soundly. However, giving up caffiene, going to bed at the same time every night, even listening to CDs that have nothing but nature haven't led to consistent success. My mind still finds a way to stay busy... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/111360/ideas-sleep http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/110546/aftermath Fri, 30 Apr 2010 01:23:15 -0400 The Long Hauler So it's been a week since the roughest portion of my major meltdown and I have a few observations I've made from looking back. Here's what I know.   1. My mind runs way too fast. It takes more than all the energy and sanity I have to keep up with the velocity in which my thoughts run. The madness comes when I can't process all of the thoughts that fight for dominance.   2. The overload sends my emotions into an unhealthy frenzy.... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/110546/aftermath http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/110083/relapses Sat, 24 Apr 2010 19:10:23 -0400 The Long Hauler These are never fun, only reminding me of the cyclical nature of Bipolar disorder and the haunting fact that there is no permenant cure to this disease, despite a good combination of medication and therapy. This is something I will deal with the rest of my life.   This last week, I had a relapse, a pretty large one. Uncontrollable crying fits, unstable thoughts, and a general bout of depression plagued me all week. This came after about a... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/110083/relapses http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/106633/medicine-swap Fri, 19 Mar 2010 02:00:00 -0400 The Long Hauler It's almost 2AM, and for the second night in a row, I'm not asleep like I'd love to be. I'm in that whole trial and error process-that's long and arduous by the way-of finding that right combo of medication that will A.) mesh well with my body chemistry and B.) treat the Bipolar and manage it effectively. Well, so far, so not good. I've been on the roller coaster of manic attacks, thought overload, total sedation, and then complete restlessness... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/106633/medicine-swap http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/101940/repetition Tue, 26 Jan 2010 04:44:29 -0500 The Long Hauler Okay, so I had been doing amazingly well the last couple of weeks. The mania had subsided, anxiousness pretty much eradicated, and life was beginning to look up. I felt as if I was finding an equilibrium with my medication regimen. Then, poof!-yes think of Adam West playing Batman with all of those fun comic book pop-ups-My mind starts misfiring, as if the words I was trying to formulate began to jumble up and criss-cross, making no sense in my... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/101940/repetition http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/100110/beautiful-plague Wed, 06 Jan 2010 15:41:00 -0500 The Long Hauler (I wrote this almost a month ago but was not able to post it because the other site was down or something.)   Hi, my name is Adam and I am Bipolar (please don't say hello back in that monotone chorus that can cause depression just by listening!). This being my first post, I debated a little, not sure what to discuss first-indecision, now THERE'S a surprise-so I've decided to talk about paranoia, something I've only recently discovered I... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/100110/beautiful-plague http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/99173/spectator-battle Sun, 27 Dec 2009 00:53:14 -0500 The Long Hauler I feel like I’m in a constant “out of body” experience playing a spectator to the war of conflicting thought perspectives fighting for superiority. It’s as if I was watching a television show about a mind with an identity crisis that shows no signs of a cease fire. I’m tired of confusion, of all the third persons fighting for the supremacy and the right to don the First Person crown, and dictate the actions and... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/623055/99173/spectator-battle