Information and opinions on health from quietlove at HealthCentral.com. HealthCentral.com is one of the top health destinations on the Web, with more than 35 condition-specific, wellness and general health Web properties. http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/889420/index http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/889420/rss self application/xml en-us 15 120 19 http://www.healthcentral.com/images/hc_logo_sm.gif http://www.healthcentral.com/profiles/c/889420/index http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/135258/life-unbearable Wed, 30 Mar 2011 03:42:23 -0400 quietlove So I am now going into my 4th year with being diagnosed with bipolar and well into my 1st year with the additional diagnosis of Borderline personality disorder. I am well knowledged of these illnesses but it doesn't help.  I am currently physically and emotionally shut down from my husband and a few very good friends of mine.  I am extremely lonely and I feel like I am completely and utterly useless in this world. I am sad and sleeping... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/135258/life-unbearable http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/111387/surprise Tue, 11 May 2010 10:59:01 -0400 quietlove Just recently I started going to therapy and to a new Pdoc to get on the right track again because the Pdoc that I was seeing was worthless.... Both my therapist and pdoc have now diagnosed me with Bipolar with borderline personality disorder.  Now all the grief, anger, depression I went through when I found out about my bipolar I am going through again with the borderline personality disorder.  Frankly I thought I was going out of my... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/111387/surprise http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/103182/lost-confused Mon, 08 Feb 2010 10:57:54 -0500 quietlove My husband and I have been married for almost 10 years. I was diagnosed 3 years ago. I never needed to share my feelings with him before but it is harder now to not have someone to talk with. I have my friends and such but its different, you know.  So this weekend we were kid-less - they were all out with friends/family.  We got into this conversation and he asked me why I loved him. I told him he is a good guy and that he is a great... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/103182/lost-confused http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/102668/added-medication Tue, 02 Feb 2010 12:32:32 -0500 quietlove Well.. My depression has gotten so bad... I was crying and not wanting to get out of bed... did not go to work for a few days... told my boss I was having a problem with that and he told me to take my time. I finally called my doctor and we talked about the different routes we can take.  We can take me completely off the effexor (but I get HORRIBLE withdrawals from that) we can up the dosage (which is no longer possible since Im at the... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/102668/added-medication http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/101153/friend-committed Mon, 18 Jan 2010 12:09:54 -0500 quietlove This man was the strongest, funniest, and most caring man I have ever met. His wife wanted a divorce and no one heard from him since the holidays.  They found him this past tuesday in his garage - an apparent suicide.  Here is my question... I fight my suicide thoughts everyday and my question is... if someone healthly, mentally and spiritually strong cannot fight them... what chance do I have? I am not strong, I can think of 101... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/101153/friend-committed http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/100634/i-did-it-again Tue, 12 Jan 2010 13:57:13 -0500 quietlove I did it again.... I chased another friend off with my craziness. I get emotional attached too fast and it freaks them out.  It's not that I am crazy (or maybe it is) it's just that i have a big heart and I want to have friends.  I think I wear the friends that I do have completely out by my overthinking and overanalyizing of everything. It's exciting to have a new friend that I swear I will wear my "good (not crazy)friend mask"... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/100634/i-did-it-again http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/92342/changing-losing Mon, 26 Oct 2009 22:52:49 -0400 quietlove The lithium has stopped working... Pdoc put me on Deprakote...going from 0 to 1500 mg FUN!!!  Rapid cycling and mixed cycles are all I know these days. I am losing my mind... I feel just as bad if not worse then what I did before I was diagnosed.  Husband is not being supportive (like he ever was).. This weekend he told me that he knows that I have bipolar (i have been dx'd for 2 years) he would just rather not hear about... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/92342/changing-losing http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/89992/living-suffering Thu, 08 Oct 2009 22:26:36 -0400 quietlove I am married... I have two kids.. I have friends.  Why is it that I can't tell anyone how lonely I feel.  How unloved I feel? I tell and cry to my husband that I am lonley and sad.. and he tells me to get over it or go to sleep things will be better in the morning. THINGS NEVER GET BETTER.. My cycles are crazy.. I am taking my pills but after awhile I start hating that I have to take them.. I revolt and don't take them! Do you... http://www.healthcentral.com/bipolar/c/889420/89992/living-suffering