Untreated RA can drive you into a severe depression. Being new to this disease can also drive you into serious depression. I would recommend counseling to help you adjust to having a chronic illness - if you can find somebody who specializes in cognitive therapy, this can be especially helpful. I've seen counselors on and off through my 40 years with this disease and a shrink I saw who did cognitive therapy was the most helpful, teaching me coping mechanisms that I still use (and I haven't had to go back to a counselor since I saw him).  But here's the thing... I appreciate your resistance to drugs, I can even understand your resistance to putting chemicals in your body. But without treating your illness, you risk permanent damage in your joints that will affect your ability level in the long run.  Mobic is an anti-inflammatory and offers  symptomatic relief, but it does not suppress your RA and that's what you need. Not taking DMARDs such as Paquinil of methotrexate puts your future at risk.  I understand your concerns about the side effects, but most people have very manageable side effects (I wrote a post about managing side effects last year and you can read that here). You may have to try a couple of different medications before you find one that works for you and you can do some research on the different kind of DMARDs that your doctor is suggesting to see which would work best for you. Plaquinil is pretty low down on the ladder of DMARDs and as long as you're monitored, usually pretty low on side effects as well.

Four years ago, when I had to consider the Biologics (and was resisting mightily), I realized that the question I have to ask myself is what is my life worth. What is it worth to me to be able to work? To love my friends and family and be part of their lives? To have a sense of humor? We each have to decide how much we are willing to do to get our lives back. (in case you're wondering, I started the Biologics and I got my life back. For me, the risk is worth it)

Although I am taking the "chemical" medications, I am also supplementing with alternative remedies - as you said, treating my disease holistically, but in my case, that involves taking what is useful from a number of different traditions, allopathic (Western) medicine included. My next post will be about alternative remedies and it will be published next week, so you can keep an eye out for that. Unfortunately, I am unaware of any alternative treatments that will pack is much of a punch as Western medicine.  That's not to say that they don't have a decided role to play to increase your overall health and to help you control your pain, but they won't suppress your RA.

Yes, you do need to exercise to keep your joints moving - not too long ago, we had a post about exercising with RA and you can read that here. You may also ask your rheumatologist for referral to a physiotherapist who can help you develop a routine of exercise that will get you moving while still protecting your joints. Oh, and one note. Many women who have RA find that things get worse during PMS - in addition to the regular  hormonal nonsense, PMS can increase your RA symptoms.

Venting is good. Carrying around feelings and suppressing them has a tendency to give you more pain. That's what communities like this are for - we know how you feel, we've been there, please continue to vent as often as you need. I'm sorry Michael Jackson's death has hit you this hard - I think there are many people in the world who feel the same way. He was very special to a lot of people.

Kim

7/10/09 8:33pm

This is where I come for understanding, for no one can truly understand unless he/she has RA.

Michael Jackson's memorial on Tuesday had me weeping on and off all day, even at work.  I spent the evening letting myself grieve because I know from experience that it is what I need to do to move on.  My RA symptoms were worse because that happens when I get upset (I think to most of us).  So...no, it wasn't silly.  Any more so than all of the crying fans when Elvis died. 

While it is wise to stay self-aware enough to reconize if you are clinically depressed, it is ok to feel down sometimes.  I think our culture tells us that it is unacceptable to feel sad.  Why on earth wouldn't we be sad at some of the challenges in life?  Throw RA on top of it all and it becomes impossible to deny your feelings.  I use about the same strategy when I feel down as when I grieve.  I journal, writing down all of my crazy thoughts.  Getting them out (venting) makes my outlook clearer. 

I've been on Plaquenil for 8 months and it has made a huge difference.  The diflenac also caused me major stomach issues and then another caused high bloodpressure.  I wasn't crazy abou taking ultracet as a pain reliever, but have learned that pain REALLY stresses me out. 

Take care of yourself.  You are very valuable.