I am missing my babies! Blue October.

This has been a rough month for me and I am looking forward to November.  Surely it will be better.  Although the things that have made me blue are not directly from my RA, they are linked.  To begin with my 19 year old son moved to Washington state.  Well, actually he rode a bicycle there.  But regardless of how he got there, he plans to stay.  My daughter also lives there.  Now the adventure he had riding across the US from Kansas to Washington was way awesome but dealing with the fact that he is gone and not coming back anytime soon is hard.  I don't travel well, so that means I don't get to see them more than once a year at most. Christmas is a definite no, I don't know when I will get to see them again.

Then the middle of the month I gave away my horse.  I had her for all of her life.  She is 9 years old, I bought her when she was 6 weeks old.  I grew up in town but have always been a country girl at heart, I wore cowboy boots all the time.  I had always dreamed of owning a horse, like most young girls.  Anyway, I bought Rose (she is reddish brown with a white rosebud shaped mark on her forehead) and planned to train her for my own pleasure but life had other plans.  About the time she should have been started with training I got sick.  I was diagnosed that winter with RA and diabetes.  And I got sicker.  Training Rose was put on the back burner of life.  And now I am too frightened of getting hurt, I don't heal like I used to, to take a chance on an inexperienced horse. Besides, I am paying for all the other rides that ended with me in the dirt anyway.  So I advertised her on craigslist and gave her to a rescue operation that will train her and put her up for adoption. I know she is better off but it still hurts. A dream died because of this stupid disease!  I have been a real crank to live with this month but I am hopeful for November.