Wow Vanessa, I love your poem! That is really touching! I think most of us with RA have fought the depression monster, so glad you ended up with a best friend in the end. My wife is the big planner, I am more wing it and see what happens. Luckily my wife understands my limitations too and includes that in her plans. Hope you have a Merry Christmas.
Brad
Like you, I always feel that having a plan makes everything better. I think it comes down to this thinking ahead instead of having to react in the moment. it allows you to make decisions like the one you and Lloyd made about going to your mother-in-law's for Christmas dinner. Planning ahead, both for the good and the bad, allows you to make a decision relative be on emotionally and practically. Good for you.
We have a couple of posts on depression and RA. Merely Me, the past Community Leader of the HealthCentral Depression site, interviewed me about depression and RA. As well, Lisa has also done a post about RA, depression and suicide. Her post includes phone numbers of hotlines that can help you if you are lost in the dark.
I love your poem and I am so glad you found a best friend.
Thanks, Lene. I hope my post helps others. You know, I was never suicidal. I just wanted the pain to stop. I know that you know what I mean. Much better now, and I love my friend. She has RA, too, so she really does understand.
Peace,
V
I think that's the case with most suicides - they just want the pain to stop. In the middle of such deep pain, whether it's physical or emotional, sometimes dying seems like the only way that can happen. I've been there. In retrospect, it's a scary place, but while I was in it, it didn't seem so scary.
You are so right, Lene. It is scary looking back, but didn't really seem scary at the time...just so painful.......and dark.
V