A recent post really jumped out at me because in it I saw myself and the struggle I had experienced when first navigating through this chronic disease (RA) we all or perhaps those we love struggle with on a minute by minute basis. What I've posted here is my attempt to reach out to Sarah.  Another forum member, Ellen, reached out to me and encouraged me to create a SharePost (my first).  So thanks to Ellen, here it is:

Hi Sarah: When I read your post I thought, "Oh I know just how she feels.  It could be my post."  I too have been dealing with RA for about 5 years now, the first 2 years un/misdiagnosed -- you know, "it was all in my head."  When I finally got correctly diagnosed I thought thank God now things will be better.  Nothing could have been further from the truth.  I had so many bad days, bad flares, days I just wanted to give up, but I didn't.  I still have some bad times and if I hear one more person comment, "I have arthritis too" when they have no idea what they are talking about, I think I am going to scream out loud!  ARRRGH  But here are some things that have got me thru:

First, find a supportive, compassionate rheumatologist who will work with you and listen to you.  If you already have one, great!  If not, leave the one you are with and find one who will commit to you and not give up on you.  Ask friends, colleagues, contact the Arthritis Foundation.  I live in central NJ and see a wonderful rheumy in Willow Grove, PA so if you're in my area let me know and I'm more than happy to share his name/number.  This is so so important I cannot stress it enough.  I made the mistake of seeing a rheumy who would not treat me until all the "signs" of RA were present (I was sero-negative in one test so she waivered).  Big mistake on my part because I suffered much damage during that 1 1/2 year period because of not being treated.

Second, find a support group.  It may or may not be your family members.  It took my husband a long time to come onboard with my illness.  I think he just didn't want to believe it -- didn't want to believe I was chronically ill and that we needed to find a new normal.  Again, reach out to the Arthritis Foundation.  Don't be afraid to talk to people about your illness -- it is nothing to be ashamed of.  You didn't choose it, it chose you.  You are still the same wonderful, beautiful, strong, talented woman you were before.  I can understand if you don't want to talk about it at work so you decide what's best.  It took me a long long time to discuss it with my supervisor and ask for his help so that I could stay a productive member of his team.  Also, talk to your primary doctor, especially if your feelings of depression don't lift.  You may need to be on a low dose antidepressant for a while -- no biggie. 

Third, get up and move.  I found out that laying around was my biggest enemy.  So now, even after double knee surgery, I get out and walk around as much as possible.  Join an arthritis exercise group at your local Y or health spa.  Get a massage, try Tai Chi, swim, try acupuncture, experiment with different things.  It will give you hope but don't crash if some of it doesn't work -- just keep at it.  Don't give in to this damn disease.  You will find something that works, trust me.