Whether the relationship is between two spouses or partners, a relationship that's just starting out or one that's been solid for years, between a parent and an older child, between friends, between you and someone who gets paid to do the job, it's important to pay attention and be aware of the shifts in the relationship. Illness and disability can make you vulnerable, physically and emotionally, and can change a previously equal and independent relationship to one of dependence and power, creating the potential for abuse. If the person helping you is being rough, causes you pain, controls your actions and choices, hurts you physically, embarrasses you or in any other way abuses you emotionally, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline. The Web site has lots of good information about what abuse is and how to get help, but remember that it's easy to check the history on a computer. If you do not feel safe at home, use a computer elsewhere, such as at your local library or call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224. If you are not in the US, contact your local City government for information.

You can read more of Lene's writing on The Seated View.