i think I am going crazy

You are not crazy.  The early part of treatment really sucks sometimes even later when the drugs you are taking seem to turn on you.  Everyone needs their own cdrug or combo of them and finding the right ones is a crapshoot!  It took my doctor 3 very long years to find the right combo for me and it was three painful years.  We tried everything!  Sometimes I woke my husband and myself up crying in the middle of the night.  You can't give up trying combinations and if I've learned anything from this it's patience.  One day at a time, sometimes one hour at a time. Learn to take baby steps, set one small goal that you know you can do, somedays my goal was to put my shoes on by myself, but when you make it, celebrate it. Know that there are others out there who can relate when those at home really can't.  This is all new for them also.  Hang in there!

When your insurance wont approve a medication, you can either pay for it or try another medication.  There is also prescription assistance out there for many medications so you should ask your rheumatologist to see it that applies to your medication.  My heart goes out to you because I know what it feels like to be the mom who can no longer do, well much of anything.  I've learned that some of the problems people have with RA, including me, is that when you feel bad you feel bad.  But then when we feel better we tend to overdue it and are in severe pain again.  It seems to be an awful cycle huh?  It is very hard at first to know your limits, especially when you are used to being supermom.  But you will learn your limits and it is so important when you do.  Keep your head up, and talk to your rheumatologist about your concerns.  Make sure you speak with him about your pain level as well as he may be able to prescribe you something stronger for your pain and something to help you sleep.  Good luck and best wishes!

Sue,

Don't give up on the medications.  It takes time to find a combination that works.  And definitely talk to your doctor about what else your insurance might cover and what programs there are for people without insurance coverage for their medications.  I know that Abbott Labs (maker of Humira) and Amgen/Wyeth (makers of Enbrel) both have payment assistance programs for people without adequate insurance coverage.  And I'm sure other drug companies do as well.  You might also check with your state government to see if there are any supplemental state sponsored health insurance programs or drug assistance programs you can buy in to. 

Christine

I understand everything you are living through. I have RA too, I was diagnosed 12 years ago. It is so frustrating to have to give up everything you used to love to do, because of the joint pain and weekness. I hate my disease too. I struggle with house work and everything else life requests of me. I am in collage, I had to change my first major because of joint pain and other symptoms. It is so frustrating. This disease is so frustrating. I am 32 now, but I can remember being 19 and strong. I used to be a volenteer firewoman before I was dianosed. In my twenties, I worked in the food service indrustry as a server and a cashier. When I turned 26, I could not longer work cause of my joints and muscles, so I applied for Social Security, I felt like I have no choice. I won that battle and now I am on Social Security at age 32. I feel like I have been struck down in the prime of my life. And, you are right this disease, tragically does not get better. I am sorry. There are ups and downs and the hope of new medications comming out. But, my medicare part D charges alot of copay for my my shot Enbrell. I am scared too, I am not sure what will happen next and I am always tired and sore and I am not sure if this is normal, but my spine hurts. It is painfully stiff and swallen. My neck is also the same as my spine. I have an appointment with my Rheumatoligist Tuesday to see about med choices and bloodwork-of course. Good luck in your treatment. Try to find peace where you can. I am

There are funds out there that will provide financial assistance to you to help offset the out-of-pocket costs.  Also, I found with my mail-order option on my insurance when I was on Enbrel and on Humira, I only had to pay the $35.00 co-pay for the 3 month supply.  That is an often overlooked option and I strongly encourage you to check into it.  My out of pocket prior to finding this was over $300.00 per MONTH.  Healthwell Foundation has a great program for co-pay assistance and there are others available.  If all else fails, check with your Rheumatologist but most importantly, don't give up.

Hi Sue yes I understand how you feel, I started with RA two years ago and it was all at once just in a few weeks time I could not walk the fluid was so bad in my knees and my wrist,they took 50 cc of fluid off my right knee once then in a few weeks too 20 some more off so I started predisone,Methatrexate it help some but still had some pain in my wrist,so now i am taking the shot Humira,it is very expensive but i called the pharmacutial place and they are giving them to me free So it is worth checking it out oh i forgot to tell you i:m 67 yrs old and I have medicare but it don"t help to much on the shots. so now i don:t have to worry about  as i said i get them free.

Please don:t give up I sleep in a chair for nights because i couldn"t get in and out of the bed thank God for a good husband He slept in a chair beside me, lift me to the bathroom set me on the toilet had to do every thing for me but i am so much better than i was 2yrs ago their is a light at the end of the tunnel that what the nurse told me the first time i visit the Doc,

well i sure hope you get better and you will

i am going to remember you in my prayers.

               Ann

Hi Sue,

I know its hard, being I too use to do all the things you have mentioned. The biggest thing for me to do was try to put my mind and head with my body! Sounds crazy, but, i too would do my house in a min. Now it takes me the week, i use to play sports, now i watch, my head always had other plans for my poor body, but little by little, i am learning to change, I dont like it a bit, but this is something i cant fight, i try to look at what i can do instead of being upset by what i cant do. Easier said than done sometimes, but little by little, i seem to be doing better, emotionally. My body too, always hurts, some days worse than others, but i try to take advantage of the better days, and yes the need to just stop and hit the sofa, use to kill me to stop and lay down, now I just do, i have to. I have learned I do better emotionally setting small little goals for my self. If i meet that goal in a day, i give myself another one, some days i do a ton more than i thought i would do, and other days i can barely get just one goal met. I guess i play the mind game with myself, it sounds crazy i'm sure, but it works for me.

I know its hard for you, but just do little by little. Your family in time will understand and hopefully be very supportive! Take care!