Yesterday I was feeling good and my daughter and my son's girlfriend was swimming in our pool. So I thought I am going in too! Well I had so much fun. I forgot all about having RA. We made big waves in the pool and I fell off my tube. I had a blasted just playing with the kids. Then we wanted to get out and get something to eat. That is when I felt it. I had a hard time getting out of the pool. Walking was so hard to do. By time I got into the house I was in so much pain. As the day went on and after dinner the pain was so bad! I really hurt my shoulder and collar bone. My knees are swollen and my hips hurt so bad. All for a small time of fun with my kids... I was in so much pain I got into a hot bath. I am running low on my Celebrex and I do not have the money to get more. I will not have enough to get me through until I see my RA doc. So I had to take one. I hate this Disease! I wish I could pull it out of me. I just want to be normal again. To be able to play in the pool with my kids and not be in so much pain. It really makes me think how this is my life. Nothing is going to take this away. Not all the shots or IV's that I can not even afford. I will always have to deal with this. Sure the drugs may help slow this down, but the pain is so bad that there are days you do not want to live. I think to myself they would put me down if I was a dog.. No I have to suffer with this for the rest of my life. I am only 43 and I think what will I be like in my 60's... For one afternoon of being normal and having fun with my kids, is now giving me days of pain that I have to now deal with.. Was it worth it? Yes.. I laughed and played with me girls and loved it! It felt good to be normal and not full of RA.. I would have to think twice before I have another day of fun in the pool...
