A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Rheumys ...

Brad Health Guide
  • Well, not really! But it COULD have! The point is I believe you have to look for the funny side of life at times, its there, even in the Auto Immune world. When you find it, it can help relieve some of your symptoms! I would much rather be able to laugh at something, including myself, than to be down and feel sorry for myself. So I DO look for the funny side of RA. I am going to share a one of my stories and hope you will as well, after all, we could all use a good laugh!

    Probably one of the biggest events of my new RA life was when my doctor wrote me a RX for a wheelchair and started the paperwork to get my Power Chair. Felt like I was giving up and RA was going to win, but I was SO wrong! It gave me my freedom back! I was able to go to stores, the mall, and most important to me, get around our neighborhood and to friends homes. As soon as my dog caught wind that "daddy" had new wheels....... she had other ideas! She would look at me, run to where we keep her leash, look at me again and give me that "IF I DON'T GET A WALK RIGHT NOW I AM GOING TO EXPLODE" look, followed closely by the "I am the most pathetic animal in the world" heavy sigh if I did not make haste to the leash hook! We (Myah and I) found out in short order that her retractable leash fit nicely over the armrest of my power chair and we were OFF to explore the 'hood. We met the neighborhood naval fleet of Ducks, ran from the Geese (nasty birds I tell you!), and occasionally snarled at cats that were bold enough to dodge out in front of such intrepid explorers! (Myah snarled, not me, well, usually not me) We also became a hit with every kid in neighborhood, Myah because she looks like a big stuffed animal and does not mind 4-year-olds pulling her tail, ears and hanging around her neck. Me, because the word on the street was the guy in the neat-o chair with the fluffy dog makes TOYS and GIVES THEM AWAY!!!! (Insert high pitched screech of delight). Needless to say, Mr. Brad and Myah now have OODLES of very short friends that have to go inside when the street lights come on.

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    All was well in our world until, one day, out of the blue, it happened....... Every neighborhood has them, that pack of feral 4-year old toughs!Cool You know the ones, they hang out at the playground, tuning their Big Wheels and Tricycles, packs of chewing gum rolled up in shirt sleeves showing off fake tattoos. Yup, we ran into the rough crowd! I had supplied some of these rough necks with rubber band guns at one point (making me vilified around the local Mom crowd) which I thought would spare me from them, but it was not to be. We were flagged down one day as we cruised past the playground, and the young-in's slowly looked over my "ride". They circled us and started to discuss what to do with the interlopers, Myah and I silently awaited our fate..... when the leader finally spoke. "How fast is that thing Mr Brad?" I laughed, and that was all it took..... the race was ON! We lined up on the dead end, barely traveled road, Myah and I on one curb, five kids on Big Wheels, Trikes and bikes stretched out across the road to the other curb....WE WERE OFF!

  • The race was from the playground to the end of the road, what looked like miles was probably 200 feet. Myah and I were off to a fast start, LEAPING ahead of the pack as they had to adjust helmets, line up training wheels and, for some reason, honk horns and ding bells. Myah and I were having none of that, giving no quarter, we were laying rubber to the asphalt as fast as we could! Now, my power chair is pretty nifty looking, flames over the front wheels, and a pirate flag and V8 symbol on the back wheel covers. HOWEVER, it still will go no faster than 6 mph........tops, with a tail wind going downhill.......... 6 mph. Needless to say, by the time we got to the first driveway, we were second to last! We were not deterred though! We were determined to teach that 3 yr old on the trike a lesson! Sadly, the ruffian left us in his dust about half way to the end of the road....... and upon our arrival at the finish line, dead last, we were thoroughly guffawed and poked fun at...... To add insult to injury, on the return trip a few of the hoodlums RAN past us to win that race, which I would like to point out was COMPLETELY unofficial and did not count!

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    These days Myah and I steer clear of the playground. Not because we are sore losers or scared of the "gang" on the swing set (or the Geese for that matter)..... we just prefer the "Tea Party" crowd, that's all. Myah claims to not like the tiaras we have to occasionally wear, but she whines all the time, so I don't buy her story........

    What sort of funny things have happened to you due to RA? I know we would all love to hear the stories! I would tell you about the time I got my power chair stuck under the table full of drinks at Bob Evans..... but my Lawyer said to not comment on that one at this time. Embarassed


Published On: August 06, 2012