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  First and foremost, trust me - this is not all in your head.  You very clearly have something going on.  Secondly, there is a saying in medicine: "when you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras".  Some people have a positive RA factor, some do not.  Your rheumatologist does this for a living and if s/he is 90% sure, it's probably a horse (i.e., RA).  Getting a diagnosis for a chronic disease can be both a relief because you finally get a name to put on your symptoms and really scary because you finally get a name to put on your symptoms.  It's going to take some adjusting and as part of that process, you might want to talk to your doctor again about the 10%, just to put your mind at ease.  I will say this, though - I've had RA for 40 years and your symptoms sound awfully familiar.   The beginnings of life with RA can be overwhelming.  Being told to take a gazillion new, serious medications can be beyond overwhelming.  The thing about this disease is that yes, it is your lifelong companion and will likely require you to be on one medication or another for the rest of your life.  Medications will help you control your symptoms, as well as the impact on the disease (joint deformities, etc.).  Most importantly, medications are a tool to help you live your life to the best of your abilities.  Because that's the point off everything you going through now, all the appointments and trying different medications: to help you get back to living your life.  And you will.  It takes some adjustment and you will learn firsthand about just how good we humans are at adapting to changing circumstances, but once you and your doctor gets to the point where you have some degree of control over the disease and symptoms, the disease will become just another part of your life.  Sometimes, it'll be a really irritating part, but you'll find a way to live with it.   Keep reading and talking here and in other online communities.  You may also be able to find support groups or people who live with chronic diseases/RA in your community.  Talking to others in the same situation helps a great deal.  Please write again and let us know how you are.  You're not alone.