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Laura,
I would bet that you have systemic lupus. The clue is that it started when you were pregnant which is very common. I have had lupus nephritis (which is now in remission) since I was 32. I am now 62 so I have done well with agressive treatment. I also have a neative ANA and a negative RA test, so obviously the tests are not definitive. I encourage you to contact the Lupus Foundation. They can be very helpful in your diagnosis. And if you find that you think you have Lupus and your doctor doesn't agreee-find another doctor!
Sharon