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RA is tricky - sometimes, you can have a negative RA factor (for instance) and still have RA. However, your symptoms do sound a lot like RA. Can you talk to your cardiologist about teaming up with your rheumatologist? Given your strong reactions to the meds, it might be beneficial if the two coordinate with treating you. Talk to your rheumatologist about your concerns with the meds - if you're not taking them because of the strong reactions you have to them, your treatment won't work. There are lots of options - other meds, lower dosages - and sometimes, it takes a bit of trying this and that before you find something that works well with low side effects.
The start of the journey with RA can be overwhelming. Hang in there and keep the lines of communication open with your doctors. Good luck!