CB: So that's how the Consumer Speakers' Bureau was born?

MS: Yes.  I've done that for many years, and I'm still doing that-for 23 years.

CB: You've been in recovery your whole life.  I wonder what you can tell those of us coming up about living with a mental illness in our later years.

MS: Well, I was out of the hospital for 21 years and then in the hospital two weeks to get a medication adjustment.  I had to go off Lithium; it damaged my kidneys so now I'm on Tegretol.  I'm trying to basically figure out what my needs are going to be.  From what I know, the medication needs change, I don't know how.  There aren't enough geriatric psychiatrists.  There's a shortage of psychiatrists and when you subtract the ones that are good from those that are marginally good, the numbers get smaller.  I'm not sure what I'd need.  I know I'd need to be in a building where I can walk in without climbing steps, one that would have an elevator.  Depression might be a problem-to get out each day, whether I wanted to or not.  Not to isolate, that has to be overcome.  The illness may change, and the dose could be different for senior citizens than the general population.  So I worry about getting a doctor that knows about the differences in medications.  In terms of housing, right now I'm in a good neighborhood but there are limitations on how much OMH is willing to pay for the subsidy, and I may eventually have to move into a cheaper apartment.  And the neighborhood may not be as good, I could get mugged.

CB: I'm a librarian, and I was particularly touched to hear you're the proud owner of a library card.  That card means so much to you.  Can you comment on this?

MS: For quite a number of years I didn't get a library card because I find it hard to concentrate and remember.  It was a side effect of the past and current meds.  I can't remember too much of what I read.  I can remember broad ideas but not details.  I used to go into the library to see what they had but I would never take out a book.  There is a library on Union Street and Clinton, and it's one block away from my apartment.  I wanted to take out videos, and so I finally got the ID together to get a library card.  This past week I was back at the branch and wanted to check my e-mails, so with the help of the librarian she set me up with a PIN number so I could sign on electronically for the computer.  I'm very happy now.

CB: Give us some parting words of encouragement and inspiration for our readers living with schizoaffective or schizophrenia.

MS: We're now in the second generation of psychiatric medicines, and in the next couple of years I hope there will be blood tests to pinpoint the treatment to give you.  And with genetics-they will develop a third generation of drugs better than the second.  I've heard it-I'd like to see it happen.