I met my husband online, we became best friends, then fell in love. I have always been a spiritual person and my wedding vows are my life long oaths.

4 months after we were married my new husband - and father to be- changed. He became extremely neglectful, self centered, leaving us (my son, my baby and I ~fresh from a C-Section) in dire straights. Meaning I had to beg him to cut wood for the wood stove in which he seldom "had time for"~we were on a Canadian farm in mid-Winter~; he took on a multitude of expensive, still unfinished projects, alienating me in the decision making and leaving our family in financial debt, and claimed I was poisoning his food ~ so he ate out with his friends. He also chased out our tenants, losing that income, and even though explained, they took vengeance by stealing from and wrecking our place.
He rolled us in his jeep trying to outrun delusions and began to interrogate me and the kids daily.

My husband was diagnosed with schizophrenia and hospitalized the next summer months after having an "episode" at work. He inherited this disorder from his aunt ~ who had acquired it around the same age. The nurses kept telling me to tell him "that home would take care of itself and he was to heal". I visited as often as I could as I was trying to clean up the mess he left behind with an infant and my newly diagnosed ODD, ADHD son.

I managed to work us out of most of the unresolved problems and debt, I put us back on track with home life and maintained a very demanding lifestyle with rare breaks while he struggled with depression and meds. He didn't shower, change clothes (he was 'metro-sexual' when we met), he just watched TV and let me do everything, ignoring me when I begged, pleaded, lectured for his aid and drive to return. After months of this I turned to criticism, judgment and ultimatums, for that I am sorry.

I started suffering from gallbladder attacks (very painful) and poor self esteem as my husband would talk of "swinger clubs" and pursuing his education by living in the city. From one 'mission' to another everyday, none of which included us as a family unit. All pointed to separation, which, from exhaustion, I was more than happy to give when his attention turned one day to divorce ~all ready with exact plans for custodial arrangements ... so I took the kids and left him, assuring him it was a break.

I was shocked when he called me 2 weeks later at my mother's and demanded an exact date of separation "for his taxes" as this event took place this past April. So we agreed on a date. It was over. All my work, wishing, and praying was dumped. He dumped me.

I immediately went into survival mode and pursued employment across the country (where income in my trade is higher). Also there are more support programs for my son.

Whilst he continued soul-searching and found himself a "friend with benefits" ~who just so happens to be a distant associate in my prof trade". He barely called. He just moved on.