I cannot diagnose schizophrenia, but from my extensive reading about the subject, I can say college is a likely time for the illness to begin to show itself in males.  I suppose you have already done some reading yourself about the subject and know that your symptoms could indeed fall under the heading of schiozphrenia because they are slightly delusional.

I suggest that rather than risk the symptoms worsening, go to a psychiatrist as soon as possible and explain what you are feeling/thinking.  Only a specialist can properly diagnose and treat.  It may be that the stresses of college life are getting to you and that is all.  You may not be developing schizophrenia at all.  But at least put your mind at ease by seeing a psychiatrist at your earliest possible convenience.

Carolyn

Hello Rachie,

(Non expert reply, but hope I might add something to help.)

So glad you have posted here, but sorry to hear of your current struggles and concern.

 I do hope you will be encouraged to take steps towards accessing  focussed professional ,specifically young people oriented  mental health services, (they are out there!) Your student support services might help direct you to the appropriate team. 

 Your distressing recent symptoms,and the attempt to hold on to your 'self', you describe so clearly in your post sound extremely exhausting. It must be using all your energy and causing you suffering, and warrants  full assessment  and relief urgently I would think...

 Be kind to yourself .You will learn that you are not alone and  your symptoms are already recognised and 'understood' if you find the right doctor, trained in this area and  with the modern positive  and empathic outlook to reality disorders in young people. Don't delay.

Are you in the States? 

 There are international guidelines for providing  services for young people who for formal  psychiatrically ,( including family history),assessed reasons ( eg Melbourne score) are considered to fall into a group with an increased future risk of developing a psychotic illness. Perhaps you might ,as you are wondering, be in this group? If so,....

The guidelines state "that if such young people are actively seeking help for the distress and disability associated with their symptoms they need to be (have the right to be! (my words added)):

engaged and assessed

offered regular monitoring of mental state

offered support

offered specific treatment for any anxiety, depression , etc accompanying...

 Paper then goes on to state a whole raft of other educational and coping and empowering strategies.

The main thing is they do not get  'fobbed off'  but are listened to, and followed up and have an ongoing support team for any issues which might develop in the future, with trust and confidence already in place hopefully.

(BJ Psych 2005: International  Clinical Guidelines Young people at risk of Psychosis )

Good luck!

Hope you will post again if you feel like it. Many people find this is a safe and supportive place to 'journal'.

Best wishes

Chris
UK

(retired doc , non psych)

family member has had psychotic episodes, as yet no treatment

Thank you all for the help and support you have offered. The information posted in the comments is very helpful. I have been feeling very strange and fearful lately and have decided to attend therapy on my campus.

Chris

1/12/09 2:37pm

Hello again Rachie,

Do hope you are getting some helpful  and appropriate help in your recent distress.

Just thought you might like to read my recent sharepost and its link  to something that might help give you info, and hope, written by Valash!

Best wishes

Chris UK