I don't know who else to turn too.

By Tay Tuesday, August 05, 2008

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Ok so, its got the point where i can't take much more of feeling like this, to be honest im even worried about writing to other people how i feel, because they will just tell me that nobody cares if im even alive or just try and hurt me. I don't know what is wrong, but someone showed me the symtoms of schizophrenia and said it sounded like what i was going through, and i got really upset cos i don't always think there is anything wrong, then other times i know there is.. I have been to my GP and they said they will refer me to a physciatrist, but its going to take a while, but i don't think i can cope much longer. I look around me and everything in the room i feel is going to turn into something and attack me, i wont go out because i always feel someone will attack me, or shoot me from the bushes, i listen to music and i feel the music is telling me something, but i cant make out what, i hear noises all the time, like people screaming or whispers. Sometimes i feel almost like im dreaming, but im awake, and i just get so confused. Also recently i have become very aggressive towards my family, to the point the other night i got a knife out and threatend them if they came near me, because i was scared, i feel they all want to hurt me, i have lost all my friends, by telling them they hated me, and i just can't cope anymore, i don't even know what to do, and i needed to ask for some advice, can i call the A&E (ER) if i feel like this, who do i turn too. But i even worry that they will hate me, they will just tell me to go away. Some days i cant even move, i just sit there, i can't shower or eat and i just want to be alone.

Comments (4) | Add comment

Christina Bruni, Health Guide

8/ 5/08 7:19pm

Hello Tay,

You are going through a lot right now and I understand you feel this way and are hesitant to talk with others. Please understand other people have gone through what you're going through. The sooner you get help, the better the outcomes.

The standard for admission to a psych ward is that a person is a danger to himself or other people. I'm sorry to say that describes what you told us. I would go immediately to the psych ER of the nearest hospital. If there isn't a psych ER, go to the medical ER and they will probably send you to the nearest psych hospital.

I hope you find relief from the symptoms shortly.

Best regards,

mimi

8/ 6/08 8:05am

Dear Tay ,

You are going through Psycosis I've been there and understand your fear , the kind that makes you want to end it all ! The phsyical pain that also accompanies the fear because you feel your all alone and no one crares if you live or die,the world would be better off without you walking this earth .

Well it simply isn't true its your mind playing tricks on you .

Please go to the ER closest to you and explaine what you are going trough and you will get help immediatly, dont wait for your doctor to find you the help you need you need it know !!

Listen too me please , your life is very important and you are here for a reason you may not feel that way now but you will once you are put on medications. The fear the pain the lonliness will al go away and you will once again function normally .

I am on several medications and live life normally again so there is hope you will see.

Keep us posted

we are all here for you especailly your family .

Mimi

Chris

8/10/08 3:57am

Hello Tay,

I know my reply is late and I do so hope you have got proper and listening psych medical attention by now, to recognise and start some treatment promptly for your 'emergency', because that is what it is, and of course it feels terrible to be acutely ill, especially when your brain is not seeing straight just now( being involuntarily at the centre of the disordered chemistry)

Relief will come with treatment.

Did you get to an emergency room?

It is very important and helpful to get that heip early. Demand it, saying just what you did in your post.Feeling bad and worthless is such a common distressing symptom of acute psychosis.

I don't suppose it is any comfort, Tay, but my impression is that the particular sufferers who have these overwhelming feelings of guilt, worthlessness, usually have very caring, thoughtful ,personas when not in the throes of illness.

Let us know how things go.You are not alone.

Good luck

Chris

mother of son with sz

Tay

8/10/08 7:39am

Thank you everyone for your help and comments, thank you all for the advice aswell, i really appreciate it. I managed to get to a doctor the next day, and explained everything that was going on. They have sent an urgent refural through again to try and get me a physciatrist, i also got put on some anti physcotics (risperidone), which have just made me sleep a lot. Im hoping that i will be getting the right help i need soon, so i can start feeling better, thank you all once again. Take care.

Taylor.

I don't know who else to turn too.

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