'I am not sick..'

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Fri, August 29, 2008

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Apprehensive just now, MAY be getting nearer to help for our adult son;

2 days ago he gave permission for us to try and find someone to assess and see if he might benefit from some therapeutic 'help' as we had been gently suggesting, but he always resisting.But this is to be allowed as a kind of 'test' only.He is sure he is not ill.

He had been low and disorganised and kept repeating 'I just dont know' so it seemed a good time to say it was hard for us to see him in this distress and puzzlement, if there was something 'simple' that might help that part of the problem, see things more clearly. Still accepting that in his view, things had external causes, 'the facts' that he was putting together to 'make sense'...

The next day,and I felt that was encouraging, he asked, if we had done anything about 'that matter'. I felt part of him was really wanting , asking for relief, but he could not initiate action himself. Was glad to say that we had got some info, and expect a pdoc's call today. Fingers crossed.

However since there has been a swing away from that, (partly fear induced I am sure, partly because different thought processes enter and take precedence) and so just don't know how things will develop. If he will get cold feet. Must not raise our hopes too high.

Chris,

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David Robbins

8/29/08 8:30am

Chris, I applaud your efforts to help your son. The mere fact you are willing to listen and try to help is inspiring. Your support is the best thing you can do for him. I know what it's like to be " not sick." When my first voices and delusions popped into my life, I thought there was nothing wrong. It wasn't until I became physically ill that I realized I needed help. My heart goes out to you and especially to your son. This illness is controllable. It is hard to accept the fact there's something wrong. Be strong. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your son. Please keep us posted.

your friend,

Dave

Chris

8/30/08 1:54am

Thanks again Dave for your encouraging reply.

(Our holiday was a good 'interlude', thanks!)

Hope you are doing OK

Chris

Christina Bruni

8/29/08 2:29pm

Hello Chris,

I am going to suggest that you read the Xavier Amador book, I Am Not Sick, I Don't Need Help, in which the psychologist coaches family members in how to talk to loved ones who have anosognosia, a lack of awareness that they have an illness.

He uses the technique, motivational interviewing, so family members can find out the life goals the loved one has, and when a relationship of trust is built, the mother or father or other family member asks if the loved one would like to hear about something that could maybe help him achieve that goal and get relief from their distress.

What happens is, the goal is not to convince the loved one he's sick, but to get him into treatment. Amador's brother, Henry [Enrique] never once believed he needed the meds; however, after years of non-compliance, Amdor convinced Henry it would be a good thing to take the drug and stay in treatment, and Henry did.

Just a suggestion.

Regards,

Chris

8/30/08 2:26am

Hi Christina,

Thanks for your post. The title of the book was why I used the words as title in my Sharepost!, as you have said it is one of the features of p sz, making it so difficult to access help.

Think it may have been thanks to searching this site I got the book reccomendatioin. when we first realised / accepted fully the likely root diagnosis of our son's struggles, say 4 to 6 weeks ago.

Ordered that book and others on line.

'when the Voices stopped ' Ken Steele's story and

'The Centre cannot hold, a memoir of my sz',by Elyn R Saks, both amazing and enriching books.

Hopefully we are now better able to listen and reflect back appropriately,having more insight into his view of the world.

We certainly can 'feel better', a strange relief, because we know we are just 'doing our best' for him, and can't do more. Wishful thinking never helps..it tends to false expectations and pressures. It is early days.

Chris

'I am not sick..'

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