Helping our son, help himself

Our son has always been such a wonderful person....caring, gentle, well mandered and always respectful. He has been living with this "illness" for just over three years and is now 22 yr of age. Just after high school graduation he was living away from home, working as a waiter and going to school full time when he started becoming paranoid. After several hospitalizations (and several diagnosis' including bipolar w/psychosis, hypoglyemic, schizoaffective, paranoid schizophrenic) he's now living at home and we are trying just to keep him well. We are afraid to put too much pressure on him for fear of him relapsing again.... so we don't demand much of him. We've been told that we might be enabling him not to get well and move on with his life as everything is too easy for him at home. We ARE trying to get him to manage his own meds so that he might be able to live on his own soon...beyond that we aren't sure what to do now. He has been fairly stable for a month or so since switching meds. One of the biggest problems is that he doesn't really understand much of what's happened to him. He is getting bored but that doesn't seem to motivate him. He just seems to be avoiding life's stresses. I guess our question is: How can we get him to help himself move on (job, school, social life) without stressing him out and causing him to relapse once again?