This long mysterious surreal journey called my life.

I believe that it is possible for me to recover to the point of becoming a doctor with M.D. and Ph.D credentials and training.  have been on the older and newer meds and I also have endured a very long duration of untreated psychosis. At 5 years of age, i went through the front windshield of my daddys car during an accident and after being unconsious for three weeks, I saw my guardian angel. I have dealt with humiliation and ridicule. At 15, I killed a man for him and his gang beating me. I was diagnosed paranoid schizophrenic reaction and found not guilty by reason of insanity and spent 2 years in a mental hospital on thorazine,mellaril, haldol and cogentin. Upon release, I went into recruit training with the United States Marine Corps and excelled to where I was meritoriously promoted and sent to a school for mechanics and did very well there also. I was sent out on a float to Korea and there attempted to help a fellow american and the fellow had a stolen tv of which i was charged for, found guilty and punished. I believe the stress caused a psychotic break because  I started talking to the man I had killed 7 years before, even though I had never talked to him before. I have read the medical records and it states that I had numerous hysterical violent episodes and had to be restrained, does not remember episodes. A navy doctor  defered diagnosing me and impressioned passive-aggressive personality disorder and the Marine Corps began discharge proceedings to separate me. I was honorably discharged with a undiagnosed and untreated psychosis and my life has been mysterious and surreal since. When I finally got a docyor to diagnose me it frst was psychotic disorder NOS and now it is schizoaffective /w mood disorder. I still struggle and I have started to reach out to try and find ways to cope and I know this journey is long from over.