Maybe this is all just about me, having schizophrenia. It is difficult you know, to find out that I have schzophrenia and must cope up with it. I am 26 years old. A Christian. Quite a bit an actor of myself, performing in church stage. So where should I start my story, cause I know you are all not a patient reader, or at least, that what's my little delusion tell me about you.
To live with schizophrenia is like living in irony, wandering about the truth, try to get healed, found the world a little bit crazy and want to get sick again. I thought and I perceive but sometimes that what's not the reality. Maybe I am just overwhelmed myself. But here I am living in irony.
Suffer? Me? No... I am great, I even hear the word of God, and the next thing I know, a voice of God HImself speaking to me. Well, what a delusion. How pathetic you would say. I can hear you now, through my delusion.
How to live? THat is a question that I have been asked myself and sometimes I asked myself how the other schizophrenic live. In state of sympathy to myself, I feel sympathy to all of the schizophrenic.
Do I blame God? Yes, in some certain span in my life. I even hate Him, because He seems not helping. But hey! That just me and my egoism. Not the way of Christian who told that God work in everything for our own goodness. So, I am considering that this just me as a metal being formed by God, and in the process, it is hard, burning, but sometimes enjoyable too, maybe because of the dopamine that go accross my subcortex, o what a brain.
So what am I try to announce here, well just my story,a story of a schizophrenic.
I even love a girl. Yes, a schizophrenic even can love. But she already have a boyfriend, and I must fall back all my army. But loves still goes on, next things I know all my delusion appear, so I am in a state like battling the evil delusion who force me to conguer her, the girl. I even send stupid e mail to my friends because my delusion told me that it is the way to get her. Well, the story of mine, and you know what, this girl has play 3 drama with me, and I must play a role as a person who loves her. Even in the fourth drama, I played as a devil who can control her mind( I thought it was a sign from God that I can be with her, sometimes I still believes this - uh). Uh, some weird life of me, don't you think? But that just life, sometimes like rollercoaster, whether you schizophrenic or not. Be happy with your state/condition, that's what I am trying to say. For me, well, I am still suffering with my schizophrenia. Sometimes I wake up, don't know what to do and just delusion playing in my head. But that just us, isn't it? And aren't we're all schizophrenic is heroes who battling the most dangerous handicap in the world. Aren't we great? Remember, we're unique, we're only one percent of the world population. I hope you got what I mean, don't let that delusion strikes you.
Hello,
Welcome to the Connection!
I certainly understand that the one percent of us diagnosed with SZ have a kind of kinship having experienced similar symptoms.
You can move forward and succeed even with the illness in tow.
Regards,
Christina
my boyfriend or friend depending on how he is has SZ and i don't understand why he doesn't talk or respond to me for weeks when he is mad at his family and so call buddies when they dont want to be around him. Please can you tell me what to do. i call and text all and everyday several times thru out the day to where i have not call or texted for the last 12 days, tell me what to do-he is mad at God because of his illness of SZ and at him mother for taking his money every pay day and his brothers and friends that dont spend time with him. But i alway am in his corner to help with any and everything from food, gas, clothes, goals, whatever but he shuts me out. the only one that is there helping so please help me understand he is depressed and very anger.
Nita, I think you need to know that you may not be able to help your boyfriend except in calling authorities if he gets violent. I really feel that you are putting yourself in a potentially dangerous situation here and that you need some time alone to think things through. Remember in my first response to you when I suggested that you find a support group in your area to help you ? Have you done that yet ? I live in Canada so I'm not familiar with your system but I do know this : your boyfriend is getting worse, you're not getting through to him, and it may be that only doctors or trained professionals can help him now.
That's the reason you're feeling so frustrated and I feel for you. It's difficult when the one we love is not in control. If you know his doctor you could inform him about your boyfriend's current well-being. That might avert a nasty situation or bad time for him although it seems as though he's going through some rough times right now. If you think he's going to hurt you or some one else, for goodness sake - get away.
Peace
Don Fraser
his is of no harm to me. his is more harm to himself keeping so much bundled in side and be social withdrawn. i cant say anything to the doctocrs becasue i dont have the authority too. only his mother that is not listening to me. she only cares about the check. he takes his meds but they have been the same for over 15yrs and have not been re-evalutaed. and the home front is not emotionally stable, he has no voice and isn't trying to have one. mom has had total control. but thanks and f you can think of anything a comment or anything to help me i would really appreciate it. since i call and text so much i decided that maybe if i dont for a while he might come around. hopfully.