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I have an intimate question that I would like to ask the community. I am 47 years old and married to a wonderful woman; we have been together for 15 years. I find it difficult to have a sexual relationship with my wife. We are close and at least best friends. I am attracted to other women and men. I am not gay or bi-sexual.
I have lived with schizophrenia all my life and have found it easy to stray from my relationships to other people. I have very real hallucinations both auditory and visual. At night I have what I can only call schizo-affective sensual dreams that are very real and cause me to experience sexual encounters with people I am acquainted with and have plutonic relationships with. They are dreams that seem to psychically connect with the person and become very intimate causing me to feel like I am cheating on my wife.
Is it common for these dreams to occur and is it also ordinary for me to be attracted to sexual partner of the same sex?
I only bring these questions up because my therapist said that in his experience with schizophrenics same sex relationships are the norm. He also went onto say that my hallucinations can add to the experience of a sensual dream.
I am 49 and female. I know you said "dreams" and not "fantasies." But I think it is perfectly normal for all men and women to have such dreams and fantasies. I am purely heterosexual, yet I have wondered what sex would be like with another woman. I have had sexual encounters with men and women in my dreams. This does NOT mean I intend to go out and have illicit sex with either men or women. I was perfectly content with sex with my husband when I was married.
If this worries you, it is something you can't just drop or ignore, so I won't tell you to do so. But I would say not to dwell on it for too long. Thank God you have a wife with whom you have a good relationship.
Carolyn