the past week has been pretty awful, I feel like people are out to get me in a way. usually one person in particular, but how can someone affect me when they aren`t even there? This is my perpetual world of unreason... believing that I can hear people talking to me when they probably aren`t. yet i continue to fight for the truth, even though its stupid. Lucky I am back at work to take my mind off things, it isnt too much of a struggle as I have been there a while now and I know the ropes. But there are other decisions loomng ahead of me which are totally stressing me out- when to go back home to Australia, whther to stay there or come back to japan. It is a big decision for me. My reason to stay in Japan- boyfriend... but I doubt that is a good enough reason. I do like it here but I also really want to go home.
So the last few days i have been in an internal fight. Luckily I found that watching the Olympics or my favourite TV show helps and brings me back to normality. Having a mobile phone doesnt really help with my illness, I use it compulsively and sometimes feel it is a waste of time.
Anyway... as I write this I am in an internet cafe which isnt very comfortable so I will leave it there....
