How I feel about living with schizophrenia varies. I am not upset at myself for having the illness and I am not in denial. I am more shocked about the diagnosis because I wish I saw the signs. I do have my own stigma though...
I am concerned about how it will affect my intimate life. I wonder if it would be harder to find a husband to cope with the illness with me. What if I have a relapse after I begin a relationship with someone and they decide that they don't want me anymore? I guess they were not the one for me.
I hope the disorder does not pass on to my children when I do decide to have kids. How will I take care of my kids if I have a relapse? I will have a relapse prevention plan. Would it be best if I did not have kids to prevent the illness from spreading to future generations? Then that would enable the disease to get the best of me which I refuse.
I can and will live a normal life. I will get my degree and get a good paying job. I will get married and have a family. I will be prepared if I have a relapse. I will not let this illness defeat me.
I will not be oppressed by schizophrenia.
