Closer to Recovery

By Ashley Smith Thursday, October 30, 2008

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I visited a college yesterday and researched the requirements to get into the school. The deadline for spring admissions is mid-November. I am very excited about the thought of returning to college. It shows progress towards recovery. Although the school provides associate degrees, and I aim to get a bachelors degree, it is a start in the right direction. Once I start school in January I hope in graduate from the institution in 2010 or sooner. When I return to school I will study Business Administration.

Recovery to me is living life the way I used to prior to the onset of schizophrenia. Before schizophrenia interrupted my life I was working, performing extracurricular activities, and going to school. Going back to school, for me, is living a normal life again.

Plan B/Update

Comments (6) | Add comment

Christina Bruni, Health Guide

10/30/08 4:23pm

Hi Valash,

Good luck with school!

You have every right to lead a normal life, by whatever your definition of that life is.

Write back and let us know how it's going.

Best wishes,

Christina

Ashley Smith

11/ 1/08 8:43am

Thank you Christina, I will keep you all posted.

Claudia Krizay

10/30/08 5:34pm

I don't know what it is like to live a normal life again because I don't believe I have ever lived a normal life. I came from a very dysfunctional family, and started having hallucinations,and problems relating to people at age six, and I never was able to work up to my potential.

I have tried to live a normal life, although having no drive or motivation to do so.my parents pushed me to the limit and it just made me more ill.

I have never been able to hold down a job or get anywhere in school, it was very painful and frightening for me- so if t his is leading a normal life I do not want to. If that is what a normal life is- I want no part of it.

I have made a life for myself- spending most of my time away from other people. I dislike being around people. In fact it makes me paranoid, and then I get scared. Then I have anxiety attacks and have to take Ativan which only takes the edge off. I take other medications that have side effects.

I don't mean to sound negative. My psychiatrist said that my lack of drive to get out in the world and work is symptomatic of my illness. I didn't know howt to handle it so I learned how to cope and make a different kind of life for myself- it may not be "normal" but it is comfortable.

i feel like Imad a concerted effort to live a normal life and every time,it blew up in my face.

nobody can be sure of what the future brings. But as far into the future as I can see, I haev just have to accept my limitations and cope the way I know how and the way that feels safest for me.

Ashley Smith

11/ 1/08 8:54am

Claudia, there is no such thing as a normal life. Recovery is what we make it, it is any way and all ways to cope with schizophrenia. Keep in touch!

Claudia Krizay

11/ 2/08 6:18am

I feel as if have come to terms with myself and my illness- this is the life that was given to me and I have made a life for myself. it is very different from the lives many people live but it is how I cope-as long as it makes me feel content and at peace- I accept and cherish it. I haven't fully recovered - maybe I will and maybe I wont but in the meantime I am probalby doing better than I have in a while.

Claudia

Donna-1

11/ 1/08 8:46pm

Valash, I congratulate you on your determination to return to college. Yes, it does show you are recovering. I was teetering on the brink of disaster the first 4 yrs I went to college, so I stopped out for a year before going back to finish and get my BS in Fine Arts. I had to take only a few courses at a time. But I managed to make only 2 B's and the rest A's in my college career. It is hard work, but you know that. I really admire you for picking up the pieces and forging from them a new and stronger whole. That is what we all wish to do.

I would like to go back to "where I was" before becoming really ill with sz. But I really don't think I will be able to do that. I have not yet recovered to the extent where I can work at all, much less be in a challenging workplace. But I have found new beginnings in volunteer work and being a caregiver for my mother. And I am so much happier than I have ever been before.

Carolyn

Closer to Recovery

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