Hello Dolly,
I understand your frustration and I am sorry you haven't received any support or ideas about how you could proceed with your son.
I would be surprised if you called the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and someone told you there is nothing you can do because he's an adult.
NAMI is a nationwide organization that advocates for people diagnosed with mental illnesses and their families. Call them at (800) 950-NAMI (6264) to get a referral to the local affiliate in your town or city, or for suggestions from the hot line.
If you have already called them without results, write back and I'll put on my thinking cap.
The truth is, if he is violent, he needs to be in the hospital. When he gets out, that is another story. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better. So many mothers are in your shoes. He is in the hospital because he is a danger to others, so that is where he needs to be.
If upon discharge they ask you to take him back home, and he has had a history of violent behavior, you could do two things: take him in because he's your son and you're afraid he'd end up on the streets (and risk physical harm) or tell the staff at the hospital that he is an adult and you feel he is capable of living on his own. This may not be the case, however, I know of one mother who had a restraining order against her own son, and the hospital staff wanted her to allow him to live with her, and she refused, saying that if the staff though he was well enough to be discharged, he was therefore well enough to live on his own.
It seems like a no-win situation, I know. If he is indeed taking the Seroquel, that is a good thing. You need to develop a relationship of trust with him so that if he decides to stop taking the Seroquel, you can gently suggest he go back on it.
In that case, I recommend an excellent book, Xavier Amador, Ph.D.'s I Am Not Sick, I Don't Need Help, which coaches parents on how to talk to their loved ones so that the son or daughter agrees to accept treatment.
Most of all, you have to set boundaries and protect yourself, and in the worst-case scenario, that could involve a restraining order. In the best case scenario, the symptoms of his illness improve after he's been in the hospital for awhile.
You do not say why he stopped taking the Lexapro but continued to take the Seroquel. Was he having side effects from the Lexapro? If so, he needs to talk to the doctor about this.
Again I am sorry others haven't been receptive. Please do call NAMI. And if you want, feel free to write another SharePost and I will respond again.
Regards,
Chri
Hello Dolly,
I understand your frustration and I am sorry you haven't received any support or ideas about how you could proceed with your son.
I would be surprised if you called the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) and someone told you there is nothing you can do because he's an adult.
NAMI is a nationwide organization that advocates for people diagnosed with mental illnesses and their families. Call them at (800) 950-NAMI (6264) to get a referral to the local affiliate in your town or city, or for suggestions from the hot line.
If you have already called them without results, write back and I'll put on my thinking cap.
The truth is, if he is violent, he needs to be in the hospital. When he gets out, that is another story. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better. So many mothers are in your shoes. He is in the hospital because he is a danger to others, so that is where he needs to be.
If upon discharge they ask you to take him back home, and he has had a history of violent behavior, you could do two things: take him in because he's your son and you're afraid he'd end up on the streets (and risk physical harm) or tell the staff at the hospital that he is an adult and you feel he is capable of living on his own. This may not be the case, however, I know of one mother who had a restraining order against her own son, and the hospital staff wanted her to allow him to live with her, and she refused, saying that if the staff though he was well enough to be discharged, he was therefore well enough to live on his own.
It seems like a no-win situation, I know. If he is indeed taking the Seroquel, that is a good thing. You need to develop a relationship of trust with him so that if he decides to stop taking the Seroquel, you can gently suggest he go back on it.
In that case, I recommend an excellent book, Xavier Amador, Ph.D.'s I Am Not Sick, I Don't Need Help, which coaches parents on how to talk to their loved ones so that the son or daughter agrees to accept treatment.
Most of all, you have to set boundaries and protect yourself, and in the worst-case scenario, that could involve a restraining order. In the best case scenario, the symptoms of his illness improve after he's been in the hospital for awhile.
You do not say why he stopped taking the Lexapro but continued to take the Seroquel. Was he having side effects from the Lexapro? If so, he needs to talk to the doctor about this.
Again I am sorry others haven't been receptive. Please do call NAMI. And if you want, feel free to write another SharePost and I will respond again.
Regards,
Chri