Sunday, June 29, 2008 Sunshine571 asks

Q: I need help with my mother who I think has schizophrenia, where can I find help to get her help

My mother's side has a history of mental illness. One aunt was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was about 5. She's on the verge of becoming homeless due to not having a job. She comes up with excuse after excuse about not taking a job or why she didn't have time to look for a job. She says quite frequently that she doesn't have time to do everyday things. She's the only person I know who doesn't have a job and doesn't have enough time to get things done. She gets her mail like every two weeks. I bought some things from her to give her some money and it took her three weeks to get the check in the bank because she didn't have time to go. I'm worried about her but how do you tell a person with mental illness that their sick. She doesn't have any health insurance so if I can get her to go get help how do we pay for it. My husband and I can't afford to have children and there would be no way we can afford to have her live with us. If she does end up homeless I don't know what's going to happen to her things and her. I don't know what to do anymore for her.

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Christina Bruni

7/ 2/08 5:45pm

Hello Sunshine 571,

I am sorry to hear your mother is on the verge of becoming homeless.

Regardless of whether you have any income or not, your income level won't affect whether you mother is entitled to government benefits. Thus Medicaid or Medicare might pay for a hospital stay, or she may be eligible for social security disability benefits, regardless of her work history or length of work or spotty trail of jobs she's left in her wake.

From what you've said, I feel she lacks insight that she has an illness, and for coaching in how to speak to her to gain her trust so that she considers treatment, try reading Xavier Amador's book, I Am Not Sick, I Don't Need Help. I've read it and I'm not paid to endorse it, so I can tell you that I recommend it.

Now I am going to say something controversial.

It is your choice not to take in your mother, and I stand by you in that decision.

A lot of times it gets worse before it gets better.

You need stability in your life.

I believe your mother is a candidate for a group home.

I don't know where you live or what resources are available, so I will make two immediate suggestions. Call the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) hot line at (800) 950-NAMI (6264) for a referral to the local affiliate in your town or city that can help you with this. Call the local hospital, ask to speak with the psychiatric ER staff to see what your options are for getting her treated right away.

A person has to be a danger to herself or someone else to get admitted, so if you see your mother getting worse, you may have to push it with the staff that she's a threat so that she'll get treatment. Otherwise, family members have often been helpless, taking their loved ones to the hospital, having the loved one turned away, and two days later the loved one is psychotic or commits a crime or misdemeanor related to the psychosis.

I suggest you explore the two techniques I've suggested to get your mother into treatment if not a group home.

I wish you some comfort in the times ahead.

Regards,

Chris