I fear that I might be developing schizophrenia...

Let me first say that I am not a doctor. What I will tell you is what has happened to me. Since people are different my symptoms might not be the same. I would seek out a professional to diagnose you. Only they can tell you.

In 11th grade I became psychotic. In health class every disease we were taught, I thought I had. Even STD's (even though I was a virgin). I thought I could move objects with my mind. I also believed that I was a reincarnated prophet. Mind reading was another thing I thought I had. I heard voices, that tolds me all that.

I was shortly hospitalized and put on meds. The meds really help. I cannot live without them.

My psychosis is under control through meds, sleeping good, eating healthy, excerise, and support from my wife and various sites.

Seek help.

I wish you the best,

Dave

A lot of mental illnesses are somewhat related but they express themselves with differing symptoms. They all seem to be fear based but the fears are of different things. Medicine classifies these differently because they have different results. The different expressions of different fears could be genetic. It sounds to me like you are under a lot of pressure but also that some fears have surfaced. Ancient wisdom says, "do not fear, do not anxiously look about you..." It might seem trite to you for me to say not to worry so much but it is good advice. Things will still work out even if you don't achieve all of your goals. You can still be happy and you can still be at peace which also should be your primary objective, like Dave on this site says, "every day is special". Enjoy the moment.

Hello rich7791,

Your question about what is happening I have read carefully and I understand you are possibly under stress with your Dad's health and maybe other things.

At this point I want to tell you in no uncertain terms to stop taking any street drugs.  Street drugs like marijuana, meth and hallucinogens can cause psychosis and the lingering effects of the street drugs can be permanent.

I would if I were you talk to a professional.  I'm not a doctor so I can't diagnose your problem.  However, I can tell you that if you want peace of mind, please talk to a professional before this gets out of control.  You are in college and mentioned doing drugs on spring break so that leads me to believe you are 18 or 19 or in your early twenties, a time of life when illnesses like SZ tend to strike.

If the professional you saw does not think you have SZ, please put your mind at rest.  There are other medical conditions for which SSRIs like Zoloft and Paxil are used, like generalized anxiety disorder as well as depression.

Before I sign off, I will suggest you try your best to remain active in the world, take showers, eat good meals, see your friends, work at a job or volunteer work, join the football team again.  This kind of a personal history, which is technically called a "premorbid functioning" level helps a person greatly should they go on to develop mental health problems in the future.

Not to make light of your situation, but even doctors studying in medical school panic when they learn about diseases and think they could have the condition they're studying about.

If a doctor has given you a diagnosis and you're unsure about it, you can always get a second opinion.  To me it seems you have some kind of anxiety going on.  Yet like I said, I can't diagnose what's going on or prescribe treatment.

When you return to school, you may want to go to the student health center at your college to see about talking with a therapist in a weekly or monthly session.  You are young, going through a lot of changes as you become an adult [as we all did when we were young] and a therapist could give you support for what you feel and what you're going through.

I hope you find some comfort and relief.

Regards,

Christina

I have felt alot better today. I didn't take my zoloft yesterday, or thus far today. But, it seems like I tell myself I have the symptoms that I read about, which, at first, are not true, but after I tell myself I have them, over and over again, I feel like i exhibit the symptoms. For example, I read that schizophrenics have bad memory and I told myself, that my memory is bad over and over again. Another example is how schizophrenics believe someone else is controlling their brain. I didn't feel this way, but I keep telling myself that someone else is controlling it and I hate it because it does not feel this way. What could this be? Also, I keep thinking of myself as a schizophrenic and telling myself that I won't be able to obtain a satisfactory occupational position. It just seems like I have contaminated my brain by learning about schizophrenia. I'm thinking this could be something associated with something in the obsessive area? Like the past couple of days, my obsessive thinking has switched from schizophrenia to questions in my mind such as.. How do we know we exist? What keeps us motivated? What is it that tells us we are hungry/thirsty? What makes us attracted to certain people and not to others? And then when I say something, such as the word hungry, I will have a thought right after I say the word, saying, But what is hungry? I mean I know what it means but why is the feeling of hunger, called hunger? It is all weird lol. Does this sound like it could have anything to do with schizophrenia? Or just an obsession with it that I am causing myself to try to resemble the symptoms of it?

well norsehockey, err, rich, i think youre fine. You clearly dont have Schiozphrenia. Quick note of reference, a person with schizophrenia is not a "schizophrenic" just as much as someone with OCD (what you clearly have) is not an obsessive. Psychotic refers to a mind state, not a person. Just be careful what you say, others are dealing with the problems you are afraid to have.

However, it doesnt sound to me like you have any form of psychotic illness. I suffer from bad anxiety and fear sometimes I am going to "lose it" or "go crazy". I have pretty much the same symptoms as you. Somedays they are worse, somedays they are better. However, constantly seeking reassurance on more than one website makes things much much worse. It seems that this is your ritual for ocd, and it needs  to be stopped. If you do have schizophrenia, is  looking up the worst possible scenario going to help your anxiety of it? I am a neurologist (just got my liscense today to be exact) and while I cant diagnose you over the internet, it seems like you have bad OCD/Anxiety. STOP LOOKING UP SYMPTOMS. STOP SEEKING REASSURANCE. Hope you feel better man.

-Thatguy

I have generalized anxiety disorder and I'm starting to think I could possibly have OCD since I obsess over my fears. I had such a great fear of schizophrenia that I was convincing myself that I was hearing voices. I also was reassuring myself that I wasn't hallucinating by making sure others could see it as well; like the cop sirens for you.

I've been to a therapist, as well as a psychiatrist who all told me that I did not have schizophrenia, and the chances of me getting it are extremely unlikely. But since I have an anxiety disorder, it's very hard to shake the fear.

I have a friend who is mildly schizophrenic and he has also told me that I'm worrying myself. The thing with fear, is that if you're so wrapped up in it; you can convince yourself of anything. Have you ever been in a creepy old house and heard all sorts of bumps and strange noises? It's about the same. You've become hyper-vigilant, so you're in tune to every thought, noise, experience you're having. What you're doing is over-analyzing every task you do and causing anxiety.

This is something that puts my mind at ease. If you were mentally ill, your family or friends would notice first. You yourself would not be afraid because you would be sick. You would not notice your psychosis and delusions. Not all, but a lot of schizophrenics don't realize their illness. They think that they have a special power and that either other people are jealous or are just crazy themselves. To be short, crazy people don't fear insanity....because they're crazy.

Schizophrenics can lead very normal lives with medication and therapy, just as I can with the disorders I have. All individuals who have a mental disorder can all work towards bettings themselves. A person living with schizophrenia does not fear the disease itself. As my doctor once told me "A schizophrenic won't fear it, because they don't have anxiety unless it comes from their delusions".

My friend who has schizophrenia is a wonderful and a usually very stable person. Instead of fretting over fears and our disorders, we should be grateful that help can be achieved and there is always hope if we allow it. I am no doctor, but from what you've said sounds a lot like anxiety. If it makes you feel better, discuss it with a doctor who will assure you that you don't have it.

On another note, I would suggest staying away from any sort of drug that can cause hallucinations or panic. Marijuana can definitely cause panic attacks.