My boyfriend wants to have kids but he says that he does not wana change a diaper i guess because of his past experience. But the thing is i want to be around to help raise the kids and he has no job. so that means i will have to be working and hire a babysitter if he still dont want to change a diaper. what should i do?
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Q: My boyfriend has schizophrenia and wants to have kids.
Answers (1)
6/ 3/09 5:53am
HELLO!
I'm sorry, but I'm going to be blunt.
Changing diapers is part of being a father.
If your boyfriend has already expressed no interest in caring for his child, and he has no job to speak of, I would proceed with caution if only because the cost of raising a kid is very high in today's world. At some point, you will resent doing all the work in the marriage to raise the kid. There is also a possibility your kid could develop schizophrenia, as it has a genetic component. If your boyfriend is not working, what is he doing during the day and why can't he change a diaper if he's not working and not doing anything else?
Your boyfriend has laid his cards on the table. By accepting his implied irresponsibility, you give him permission to act the way he does. So that, if you marry him and have kids and he wants no part of raising them, you were forewarned.
Also, if your boyfriend has schizophrenia [like I do], managing his illness can often be a full-time job. I chose not to have kids because of this, and because I didn't want to have a kid who could develop schizophrenia
The choice is yours to make. I can't tell you waht to do, I can only call it like I see it.
Best regards,
Christina
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By Becca— Last Modified: 11/12/10, First Published: 06/02/09
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Hello
the reason why he does not want to change a diaper is because his father malested him and his little brother when they were kids and i guess he dont want them to feel like he did when his father did that stuff to him. Its a hard feeling to express. And he has seizures and blackouts thats another reason why he cannot get a license at the time because he just recently had a blackout. I guess he could get a job but then again i am not sure what the doctors think about him getting a job. My best friends mom has schizophrenia and she worked at the Nestle company for a while then they made her quit, but she could still drive though. I do love this boy with all my heart and i could never hurt him. All i want to do is be a good girlfriend and help him. I appreciate your responses. Thank You!