My dad has schizophrenia and he never wants to do anyhting with the family,is that normal?

Hi Michelle:

Only your dad's psychiatrist, who is familiar with your father's illness, can answer your question definitively.

Having had schizophrenia for over fifty years, I can think of any number of possible answers, but each person is as different as the medications they take.

Robin

Hello Michelle,

I understand your upsetment about what is going on.

As Robin said, each person diagnosed with schizophrenia responds differently to the medication, as well as being an individual in their response to what happened to him or her.  Your father may feel that it will be too stressful for him, or that, perhaps, others will pcik up on the fact that he has a mental illness, when they meet him.

Offer to go with your father to these events, and let him know that if it gets too much, you will respect his right to leave early.  As hard as it is, sometimes people diagnosed with schizophrenia have to take moderate risks.  Only by taking one or two chances will your father know his limits.  He can always opt to bow out of stressful situations after he has attempted to be a part of them.  If the stress gets too much, please remember all the good things about your father (that he loves you, for one) and that he probably would rather it be different.

Find things to do together as a family that he can take a part in.

I hope this helps.  I believe you've written to the Connection before.  I want you to know that you are not alone.  I wish you to have a good night and do write back if you feel the need.

Regards,

Chri

Someday my daughter will ask the same question you have.  right now I'm lucky she thinks I'm just lazy.  If your father is like me, he is very aware of his limitations, and his actions should be accepted.  However, we can be tricked into doing things.  Try wording your offer to do something differently.  Some ways of asking that may ellicit a more positive response are "I'm going to .... wanna tag along" (this may make him feel more protected because he doesn't have to assume a leadership role in the expedition, he's just 'along for the ride')  or start small "lets go get a drink (take him to whatever gas station he trusts for a soda)  then continue "can we run to the .....  I need to grab something..."  (If he's suffering from agoraphobia you are slowly conditioning him towards targets farther from the norm, it may take an hour to get to your actual destination, but he isn't jolted into it.)   If it is a day where he has showered and has clean clothes, you are much more likely to get him out the door.  Did he sleep well the night before?  Big issue!  If he didn't, he won't feel like he has the mental energy to combat whats taking place behind the voyage, and he won't risk it.  Of course I could be totally wrong--these are just things that work for me.