Hi magentaflame,

Certainly get married if you love each other, will honor, protect and respect each other, and will stand by each other should one or both of you have a relapse of your condition.

People with schizophrenia and other mental illnesses get married all the time.

Also remember, you have the built-in support of someone who has been through what you've gone through, and can understand and will accept you.  Unfortunately, there's a lot of stigma still out there in the world, so it's nice to know you can come home to someone after a hard day, and he'll understand what you're going through and not shun you because you have an illness.

Lastly, if two people with a mental illness marry and want to have children, there's an elevated risk that their children will develop some kind of mental illness, too.

People with mental illness who do decide to have children raise families all the time, some have healthy children, others have children that need attention because they get sick.

I decided long ago that I didn't want to give birth, because I didn't want my child to develop schizophrenia.

If you're doing well and have been stable for at least five to seven years, I would say, only then consider having children.  You have to be realistic, and honest with yourself, as to whether you can deal with the demands of managing your mental illness and the demands of being a Mom, at the same time.

This is not to dissuade you, rather, I want you to understand what you'll be getting into.  So:  marriage, yes.  Children: only after careful consideration of the risks and if you are willing to take that risk.

Congratulations on finding the person you want to spend your life with.

He sounds like he could be a great guy.

Write back and let us know how it goes, if you'd like.

Best wishes,

cb