Saturday, October 25, 2014
Friday, June 12, 2009 Alex, Community Member, asks

Q: Ashamed of small penis

I've been going through some sex forums to see if anyone dealt with my problem. On another I found the following question but the poster got NO responses. I don't know who this guy is, but I swear I could have written this myself. What he says describes me and expresses everything about my fears (except I'm 6' even not 6' 2" like him):

"I am in my 50's and have a small penis. Its about 2" soft and 4" hard. It has affected me psychologically from being quite young. At school I hated showers. Nowadays I cannot use public urinals, hate being in swimming trunks and changing rooms. I feel inadequate and inferior to other men. I have no self confidence with women. I feel people will somehow 'know' just by looking at me. I never felt comfortable at work in meetings and also suffer from bad blushing.

I still feel as bad and when anyone tells me 'its not what you've got its what you do with it' I hate it - no help at all - what do you expect me to say "oh thats OK I'm OK then?!"

"Thing is I'm quite normal - I love women and sex. I have always wondered if there were women out there who 'prefer' smaller guys (though I am 6ft 2" by the way!). All the personal ads and porn indicates women like 'big' guys. Everything I see on the net and in changing rooms reminds me how small I am and I hate it. Though I do my best to cover my inadequacy and outwardly appear happy and normal. There is no surgery or treatment I just wondered if anyone suffered like me and if any women could ever be really turned on by a guy like me."

I mean what's wrong with me (and him)? At least there's one other guy my age who feels that same way I do. I'm terrified that I'm going to be laughed at and be nothing but a laughing stock. Just this morning I heard some woman interviewed on a radio show saying that she found out some guy she was dealing with had a small penis she would just laugh and tell him to leave. I would rather be the biggest jerk in the world with a big penis then sone nice guy with a small one.

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Answers (6)
Merely Me, Health Guide
6/15/09 6:25pm

Hi Alex


First of response to the spam I just saw here.  There is no way to enlarge one's penis.  Not gonna happen.


Secondly...I think maybe what you go through is what some women go through with having smaller breasts.  In our society we seem so hung up on the size of things.  Yet sex and especially intimacy is so much more than someone's cup size or penis size.  Men seem particularly worried about their size down there and honestly this is not something on women's minds so much.  And I am not saying that just to make you feel better.


There are many ways to satify a woman which have nothing at all to do with the length of one's penis.


 As pointed out in a previous comment...I have answered a question about this previously and I am going to cut and paste it here for you to read.


I think men have been asking this question for centuries and for centuries women have been saying, "It doesn't matter!"



And now onto the matter of how women feel is a quote from a medical news site:



"A survey then conducted of over 50,000 heterosexual men and women found that 66 percent of men said their penis was average-sized, 22 percent said large and 12 percent said small and while 85 percent of women were satisfied with their partner's penile size, but only 55 percent of men were satisfied with their penis size."


And a study reported on fox news validates what any woman will tell you and that is that girth is more important than length: 


"About 90 percent of women actually prefer a wide penis to a long one, according to two studies included in the review."


I hope this is reassuring.  Thank you for your question.

ZeketheGeek, Community Member
5/15/12 3:17am

Part of your response said this: "And a study reported on fox news validates what any woman will tell you and that is that girth is more important than length."


I see this answer more often than not, and I wonder why anyone would think this is at all helpful.  You see, we men with penises that aren't that long in general are also not that thick, so we lose out in both areas.


I suffer from SPS (Small Penis Syndrome), and the truth is there is simply no answer that will help make it better.  I'm trying CBT on the issue, with limited results, but honestly the best thing that women and experts can do is just NOT COMMENT on the issue.  You don't get it.

Paul, Community Member
6/12/09 5:51pm

Read this article, this question has come before.


And this article.


Hope they help.

Mr. Manpower, Community Member
6/15/09 5:12pm

Why do you assume that there is no surgery or no treatment...there are actually both!


There is a penile enlargement surgery, and then there are exercises, called natural penis enlargement.


I saw before and after photos of a man who increased the length of his penis by 2 inches, from 3.75, to 5.75 inches...check this out:


"And my Dick Runs Deep, So Deep......"


Most people gain an inch, but also quite a few gain 2 inches can take up to a couple of years (gains are little at times, but they add up), but what do you got to loose.


Or you can always take the easy (but expensive) way out, and get surgery.


Good luck on your journey my friend.Wink

mz ladii, Community Member
6/16/09 4:46pm

there are ways to get you penis to get bigger during boyfriend takes pills. dont be ashamed because i dont see a problem with not having a BIG penis. talk to your doctor about it and he will help you enjoy sex. a penis size doesnt matter because there are other ways of having good sex and alot of women dont really care about how big a mans penis is...

Nicky81, Community Member
4/26/10 7:17am

There are some ways to make your penis LOOk bigger as opposed to really making it bigger. The first is to shave your pubic hair as it will make your penis look about even and inch longer than what it is.


The next would be to lose weight around your abdominal area if you have a lot of fat there. 4 inches is not too bad a size and if you lost a few inches off your waist, it can easily look like a 5 inch penis even though it is only 4 inches.


Do not every try pills and pumps, they will just take your money and not give you any results and will result in more and more frustration for you. If you really wanted to somehow increase the size of your penis, you could probably try penis enlarging exercises although the process is slow and takes time.

mezmerize, Community Member
7/30/13 7:53pm

Hsy dude sorry to hear your story i know how it feels i am 25 my cock is also about 2 inches soft and 5 1/2 errect. At the end of the day we didnt ask for a small penis and therefore there is nothing we can do about it. Yes it is very embarrasing but i think we just have to try and be comfortable with what we have. At the end of the day woman may like bigger penises but love isnt just about what you have downstairs its the 101 other things that make us physically attractive. Hope this has help in some way. :)


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By Alex, Community Member— Last Modified: 05/09/14, First Published: 06/12/09