I have been married for 9 years the first year (newlywed year) I think we acutally had sex 5 times during the year. Since that I have been in a sexless marriage, sad thing is I don't understand it either. When I would address it with him, this is what I heard..now his excuses started with 1 and continued with different excuses each time.
1.my boobs were to little, maybe if my boobs were bigger
2.I was too skinny, maybe if I gained weigh
3.I am always the initiator, stopped being the intiator
4.My shorts/dresses are too short, dressed different for him
5.He is tired from work, left him alone
6.Slept in another bedroom, satisfied myself
8.No intimacy, peck kissed on the lips, became peck kisses on top of my head
7.Last excuse he gave was its becasue I was married before and everytime he touches me he thinks about it.....my approach ....DIVORCE
I still do not know what his problem was, but I do know he made me question myself "what is wrong with me", but then I stopped that kind of thinking because there is nothing wrong with me....he emotionally check out of our marriage. He is 56 and I am 49 and the way I see it is, You only have one Life, one time around, don't waste it! I may end up never having sex again,I hope I can find someone. I hate that 9 years of my life were wasted years and now I am 9 years older, but that is ok I just want to be loved and desired by someone who can.