Doctoring Your Dick
Still thinking about a penis enlargement? Here are some facts. There are two kinds of enlargement surgery. The most common involves cutting the main suspensory ligaments that anchor the penis to the pubic bone. This allows a portion of the penis that's normally inside the body to hang outside, which may make the penis look an inch longer. The second type, which is often done together with the first, involves taking fat from the abdomen or thigh and injecting it under the skin of the penis to make the shaft thicker.

According to Jaffe, neither procedure has any positive impact on sexual function, but there are major downsides to both. The suspensory ligament holds the penis in place, and when it is cut, the penis is often "floppy like a wet noodle." In the second procedure, the fat injections can settle into "irregular shapes." In any case, the fat is usually reabsorbed by the body within a few months, often leaving behind unsightly bumps. Both techniques are relatively new (read: experimental), no long-term studies have been done, and most reputable urologists and plastic surgeons discourage them.

Since there's lots of money to be made in upsizing the penis, in addition to these surgical options, you'll find a panoply of penis pumps and prods out there. Put your money away. According to Jaffe, none of these have any real impact on penis size.

Little Helpers for the Little Guy
Still not content leaving well enough alone? Okay then, here are a couple of safe little tricks you might want to try:

• Lose some weight. If you're carrying a few extra pounds, some of that excess fat is deposited at the base of the penis, which can make your little guy look littler.
• Get a haircut. Trimming or shaving the pubic hair at the base of your penis can expose more of the shaft, creating a very pleasing optical illusion.

But the fact remains that if you need a confidence boost, you should focus on the things you can really change that will make you more attractive to girls. Be considerate and kind. Call when you're going to be late. Buy flowers. The truth is, if men spent half as much time worrying about pleasing their partners as they do about their penis size, everyone would be a lot happier, both in and out of bed.