Do People With Depression Push Other People Away And Shut Them Out?

Question

Asked by Z111

Do People With Depression Push Other People Away And Shut Them Out?

for the past few months i have been seeing a guy on and off who is a chronic weed smoker. We go through stages of being in contact then we argue and dont speak for weeks. Then we start talking again and everything is great, he tells me hes really into me. But for some reason his head is messed up (weed im guessing) so he cant get into a relationship as he doesnt want to explain himself. He is constantly down on himself saying how he doesnt like himself and hates his job etc etc. Hes so pessimistic too, and has mentioned to me before that he wont go to the doctors as he says whatever pills they hand out nowadays have prozac in them. It feels like he pushes me away. I know he likes me cause ive seen the signs, ive even seen photos he has of me on his computer lol. He wont let me get to know him. I really like him but when he acts this way he makes me feel that he is no longer interested and just dont have the guts to tell me he dont like me

Either that or he is ashamed to say he has depression.

Any info would be a help. Thanks

Answer

Pushing people away, shutting them out, is one of the most common effects of depression. Sometimes, when depressed, I've felt completely unable to face anyone - or I'm so wrapped up in the pain, trashing myself, despairing more and more - that I'm pushing everyone away without even realizing it. There are times when people have reached out to me from love and concern, and I haven't even been able hear what they're saying. I blank everything out.

Add to that a weed habit, and things can be worse because getting high just covers up what's going on. It becomes easy to deny there's a problem and never get any help. those ups and downs you describe in the relationship can also be typical of depression. It's hard to know who you're dealing with.

I hope he can some counseling to sort out what he's feeling and going through.

It's hard to deal with this - and please come back here whenever you feel the need.

John